Happy Birthday, ya fucker. Hope you're not caught in the throes of a quarter life crisis due to your anniversary like me. Ho ho ho.... fuck.
Yeah, go Matlock! Go Matlock! Go make an ass out of yerself, get hammered and say lewd things to women. And if anyone asks them why you're behaving like an animal, pee on them and tell them it's because George W. Bush told you to.
Mahalo.