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[Blade2.0]

So I was an idiot and went to Hattie Bs tonight to get their hottest sauce, shut the cluck up. I got 3 tenders, fries, and their grits. I finished it all, had to use blue cheese with their sauce. Couldn’t do it without some reduction in heat. Finished it up and I’m no fool, I went to the restroom and put soap all on my hands and did that for a solid minute or two. Thought I got the spices off well enough and had to pee. Well guess who has egg on his face and a burning penis? This guy. This guy right here. I look forward to your roasts. Thanksgiving is upon us, after all.

 

[Hrk69]

Be glad it's not burning because of STD's

 

[GHG]

Just be thankful no women were harmed in the process.

 

[ÆMNE22A!C]

Be glad it's not burning because of STD's

Username checks out

Yeah I've had the same but wity my eyes lawl.

 

[jufonuk]

Imagine if you had taken a shit and wiped your ring piece.

 

[The Cockatrice]

dafuq kind of unhealthy sauce leaves eggs on ur face and penis even after washing ur hands? Sounds like chemicals than actual pepper.

 

[ÆMNE22A!C]

Chemicals in food?

 

[Ozzy Onya A2Z]

Just be glad you didn't fap before you realised.

 

[MayauMiao]

Look on the bright side, it helps with the no nut November.

 

[ForAcademicPurposes]

 

[Little Mac]

 

[Trilobit]

OP's dong:

 

[Putonahappyface]

I hope you had a friend close by to help out.

 

[GymWolf]

What the fuck do you mean with eggs in your face??°

Is it american slang for a pantless dude sitting on your face or what?

 

[Irobot82]

So I was an idiot and went to Hattie Bs tonight to get their hottest sauce, shut the cluck up. I got 3 tenders, fries, and their grits. I finished it all, had to use blue cheese with their sauce. Couldn’t do it without some reduction in heat. Finished it up and I’m no fool, I went to the restroom and put soap all on my hands and did that for a solid minute or two. Thought I got the spices off well enough and had to pee. Well guess who has egg on his face and a burning penis? This guy. This guy right here. I look forward to your roasts. Thanksgiving is upon us, after all.

I need to actually head downtown one of these days and go eat at Hattie B's.

 

[Toots]

That is the way we learn OP, by hurting our faces and dicks so bad we never forget.

 

[BlackTron]

Spoiler: Real Footage

 

[Blade2.0]

What the fuck do you mean with eggs in your face??°

Is it american slang for a pantless dude sitting on your face or what?

“Egg on your face" is an idiom that means to appear foolish or embarrassed because of something you said or did. For example, "Terry had egg on his face after boasting that the examinations were really easy, but ended up failing most of his papers“

I got egg on my face because I thought I was being smart, getting the spices off my hands like I should, but instead I just ended up still burning my dick.

 

[BlackTron]

 

[lee50_10]

 

[DonkeyPunchJr]

At least you didn’t go home and finger your wife.

 

[RJMacready73]

Real men would've sucked it up, went home banged the wife and passed that fucker on...

 

[DonkeyPunchJr]

Real men would've sucked it up, went home banged the wife and passed that fucker on...

Yeah on second thought, this is a good test. If she enjoys the spicy surprise that means she’s a keeper.

 

[RJMacready73]

Yeah on second thought, this is a good test. If she enjoys the spicy surprise that means she’s a keeper.

You get laid, dick gets cleaned win win.. well up until she kicks the shit out of you but hey thems the risks

 

[AJUMP23]

I thought you were going to touch your eyeball. The other probably sucks too.

 

[Kraz]

 

[ahtlas7]

Tenders, crotch burn, Thanksgiving …

 

[BlackTron]

At least you didn’t go home and finger your wife.

 

[Lunarorbit]

Imagine if you had taken a shit and wiped your ring piece.

Honestly who hasn't done that? Fire poops are a rite of passage into adulthood

 

[IntentionalPun]

I love that, makes me feel alive.

 

[Miyazaki’s Slave]

At least you didn’t go home and finger your wife.

 

[Big Baller]

 

[jufonuk]

At least you didn’t go home and finger your wife.

 

[Heimdall_Xtreme]

Username checks out

Yeah I've had the same but wity my eyes lawl.

No llores, Ni chille.

.

Be a Man

 

[ÆMNE22A!C]

Take cold showers post night frost and return, my man

 

[Rentahamster]

Well guess who has egg on his face and a burning penis?

Would you prefer burning egg and penis on your face?

That'll be $50.

 

[ÆMNE22A!C]

Would you prefer burning egg and penis on your face?

That'll be $50.

 

[violence]

 

[Blade2.0]

You can't scrub this from your mind, just like I couldn't scrub the spices from my dick.

 

[Blade2.0]

You guys Fire reacting is giving me PTSD.

 

[TheDreadBaron]

Whenever I see this thread title I'm imagining the spice melange.

 

[DeafTourette]

Whenever I see this thread title I'm imagining the spice melange.

"The Spice must flow!"

 

[Northeastmonk]

Grab some milk and rinse yourself off with it.

 

[-Minsc-]

I had the stupidly spicy wings at pub once. Knew to keep my fingers away from my eyes. Used the back of my wrist or my arm to wipe the tears. Even then I could feel a hint of the sting. Like, was it coming out of my sweat glands?

Edit:

Grab some milk and rinse yourself off with it.

There's a nasty milk bath image out there somewhere.