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Is this guy flirting with me?

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A

aoi tsuki

Member
i have a customer who comes in usually once a week. He orders the same drink, and usually pics up a PC gaming mag. When i give him his change, there's always an awkward moment where he makes direct eye contact with a sorta nervous smile. The thing is, i always make eye contact with my customers, but it's usually brief and to let them know that i'm paying attention to them. But with him, it's like he's gazing into my eyes. Sometimes it's compounded by the fact that i'm not wearing my glasses, and so it takes me a fraction of a second extra to focus.

The first time i saw him, the gazing session probably lasted three or four seconds, before i just felt really uncomfortable and looked away. It's not like he's overtly giving me "the look", but it's not a normal look either. i don't want to give him the idea that i'm interested in him.
 
B

BojTrek

Banned
you should FHUTA or let him FYUTA, or you could SHTD or he could SYTDPIHC... maybe he just wants to BYOTCATYLHLB? You never know...
 
Tritroid

Tritroid

Member
If he keeps coming in frequently like that, then yeah probably. Go for it if you feel like it, casual secks = awesome.

I had something similar happen to me at a Gap one time. I was shopping for a pair of khakis (The only thing I ever go into a Gap for because everything else is crap), and I was at the counter waiting to pay for them, and this guy walks out and does the usual: "Will that be all for you today?" so I respond with "I think so." He then glances at me while working with the register, suddenly takes a whiff of something in the air, and goes: "mm, what cologne are you wearing?" Completely caught off gaurd I reply: "Uh...Stetson..." He then literally bends over the counter and sniffs the area around my chest, "It smells really nice." He says as he smiles at me.

I told him thanks grabbed my bag and fled. The fact that I was in a Gap store alone caused sexual tension to be the farthest thing from my mind. :p
 
N

norinrad21

Banned
And it feels like
OooOooooOOo...
U don't know my name
round and round and round we go
Will you ever know?
It feels like
OooOooooOOo...
U don't know my name
round and round and round we go
Will you ever know?
 
Phoenix

Phoenix

Member
Kick off a simple opening conversation with 'how are you today' and see how he reacts. Its a 'small door opening' that will allow him to make a move if he has a move to make (and he has the balls to do anything). If he gives a short one word 'fine' or similar, he's just staring at you because of your appearance and isn't really interested (or has no balls). In either event, it won't go anywhere.
 
B

BojTrek

Banned
SHTD - Show him the door

SYTDPIHC - Show you the dead person in his car

BYOTCATYLHLB - Bend you over the counter and treat you like his little bitch

Of course everyone knows...

FHUTA - Find His Umbrella That Afternoon

and the famous and popular

FYUTA - Forty Years Underwater Toward Atlantis... I was struggling with this one...

Anyone else have any?
 
A

aoi tsuki

Member
Phoenix said:
Kick off a simple opening conversation with 'how are you today' and see how he reacts. Its a 'small door opening' that will allow him to make a move if he has a move to make (and he has the balls to do anything). If he gives a short one word 'fine' or similar, he's just staring at you because of your appearance and isn't really interested (or has no balls). In either event, it won't go anywhere.
Click to expand...
i've done that and he's never made a move, but it always seems like he wants to.

And no, i'm not interested in him sexually. i just get a lot of guys who seem to be interested in me in that sense, and i want to know so that i can let them know that i'm not interested in guys, and we can both move on. Last week i met a guy at a local coffeehouse who's from the same area of Michigan as i was. He's an art director with big interest in theater and offered for me to drop by his apartment top look at his art. A month or so before that i was in the bathroom a big, hairy, plaid-wearing trucker type at the urinal next to mine asks me if i like bears.

It's just rather annoying and a more recently a blow to my ego when i get more guys who are interested in me than women, not like there's a great selection of women to choose from here.
 
B

bishoptl

Banstick Emeritus
aoi tsuki said:
A month or so before that i was in the bathroom a big, hairy, plaid-wearing trucker type at the urinal next to mine asks me if i like bears.
Click to expand...
akuma5B15D.gif
 
E

elitehebrew

Member
Its not as bad as when i was sitting in the middle of my campus listening to music on my Ipod when some guy came up to me and gave me his number. And walked away....Immediately after the confusion for a second i was like WTF
 
Tritroid

Tritroid

Member
aoi tsuki said:
A month or so before that i was in the bathroom a big, hairy, plaid-wearing trucker type at the urinal next to mine asks me if i like bears.
Click to expand...
haha, what did you tell him ?
 
D

Doc Holliday

SPOILER: Columbus finds America
This thread is useless without pics.

P.S all guys want you, why? Because you're a girl. of course he's flirting with you.


LOL i just noticed you're a guy LOLOL, disregard my post.
 
Phoenix

Phoenix

Member
aoi tsuki said:
i've done that and he's never made a move, but it always seems like he wants to.
Click to expand...

Then don't sweat it. Since you're not interested in men, its not a big deal. Let him just enjoy seeing you and shopping at your place. Since he's never made a move - chances are he doesn't want to or know how - and that's okay. Don't feel that you NEED to let him know that you aren't interested in men. If it comes up, then bring it up - but otherwise its all good. I have many homophobic friends who are very intent on making sure that no one gay every approaches them or whatever. Its not necessary. All I've ever had to do is say 'I'm straight' and it was all good. The confrontation just isn't necessary and only forces people to go 'underground' with their behaviors when it isn't necessary. Just like you'd walk away if a woman said - 'I'm not interested in guys' (though I'm sure you'd want to watch), so too will a gay man move on.

I grew up in New Orleans where there is a fairly healthy gay community and where I work there are a fair number of gay and lesbian people here. It doesn't really bother me because I'm not trying to get with them and they aren't trying to get with me - so its all good.
 
A

aoi tsuki

Member
Tritroid said:
haha, what did you tell him ?
Click to expand...
i said something like "Umm... yeah, they're okay i guess" and he just left. i was annoyed by the fact someone talked to me while i was using the bathroom, part of the reason i use stalls. It didn't hit me until later what he was talking about.

Phoenix said:
Then don't sweat it. Since you're not interested in men, its not a big deal. Let him just enjoy seeing you and shopping at your place. Since he's never made a move - chances are he doesn't want to or know how - and that's okay. Don't feel that you NEED to let him know that you aren't interested in men. If it comes up, then bring it up - but otherwise its all good. I have many homophobic friends who are very intent on making sure that no one gay every approaches them or whatever. Its not necessary. All I've ever had to do is say 'I'm straight' and it was all good. The confrontation just isn't necessary and only forces people to go 'underground' with their behaviors when it isn't necessary. Just like you'd walk away if a woman said - 'I'm not interested in guys' (though I'm sure you'd want to watch), so too will a gay man move on.
Click to expand...
The thing is i like things to be concrete. i don't like to have to wonder if someone, male or female, is into me. Ironically, i've moved on since i originally wrote the first post two weeks ago, but i was waiting for my GAF registration to clear, and still wondered what others thought of the situation.

And no pics. i'm nothing super special, i'm sure it's more of an issue of not being around here, and people looking for something different.
 
A

aoi tsuki

Member
Assuming that's like bi-curiousity, if i was i'd just come out and say it. GAF is a friendly enough place to those who aren't straight.
 
K

Koshiro

Member
aoi tsuki said:
It didn't hit me until later what he was talking about.
Click to expand...
Still hasn't hit me, what WAS he talking about? I can't see the inuendo in that at all, but I'm not up on gay talk.
 
M

mightynine

Member
fate.gif
stormtrooper2.gif


There. That amuses me.

Oh, and since I can't even pick up a girl these days, I don't think I'm any good at offering advice here.
 
S

Spiritreaver

Member
Koshiro said:
Still hasn't hit me, what WAS he talking about? I can't see the inuendo in that at all, but I'm not up on gay talk.
Click to expand...

A bear is some large man (usually flabby) who's very hairy all over., and gay.. usually.

Anyways, if this is such a big flipping dealw hy don't YOU make the first move and pull him over somewhere private when youg et the chance and mention it? Just be polite about it and ask if there's anything wrong or something of sort. Really, it seems like you're too freaked out to break the ice too. So do something about it, I don't think asking him "How are you?" a bunch of times is helping your cause. If anything doing it more than once shows you're giving him attention which makes him ponder more, so you're just digging deeper into a hole. So I suggest you take the initiative and talk to the guy if you can, privately of course if possible. No need to make a public spectacle. Also, you're getting a bunch of guys right? There must be a reason for this.
 
L

levious

That throwing stick stunt of yours has boomeranged on us.
Doth Togo said:
He's looking at you. Aren't human beings supposed to show respect to each other by making eye contact?
Click to expand...

I was raised to show respect by looking down rather than staring someone in the eyes. Guess it depends on the culture.
 
E

evil ways

Member
aoi tsuki said:
i have a customer who comes in usually once a week. He orders the same drink, and usually pics up a PC gaming mag. When i give him his change, there's always an awkward moment where he makes direct eye contact with a sorta nervous smile. The thing is, i always make eye contact with my customers, but it's usually brief and to let them know that i'm paying attention to them. But with him, it's like he's gazing into my eyes. Sometimes it's compounded by the fact that i'm not wearing my glasses, and so it takes me a fraction of a second extra to focus.

The first time i saw him, the gazing session probably lasted three or four seconds, before i just felt really uncomfortable and looked away. It's not like he's overtly giving me "the look", but it's not a normal look either. i don't want to give him the idea that i'm interested in him.
Click to expand...

When you give him his change, does he scratch the palm of your hand with his middle finger?
 
T

tree fiddy

Member
evil ways said:
When you give him his change, does he scratch the palm of your hand with his middle finger?
Click to expand...
Is that some sort of gay signal?

I heard that at a urinal, if a guy taps his left foot twice, it's a sign he wants sex.
 
O

ohamsie

Member
tree fiddy said:
Is that some sort of gay signal?

I heard that at a urinal, if a guy taps his left foot twice, it's a sign he wants sex.
Click to expand...


Is that real? I always thought when guys would do that it was just a nervous habit or something, like twiddling your thumbs. It always struck me as strange that people would tap their foot, seems like it would jostle what you're handling.
 
T

tree fiddy

Member
ohamsie said:
Is that real? I always thought when guys would do that it was just a nervous habit or something, like twiddling your thumbs. It always struck me as strange that people would tap their foot, seems like it would jostle what you're handling.
Click to expand...
I can't verify that foot tapping thing. It's just something I've heard.
I wouldn't really know if that's true anyway. I don't swing that way.
 
C

Crispy

Member
aoi tsuki said:
i said something like "Umm... yeah, they're okay i guess" and he just left. i was annoyed by the fact someone talked to me while i was using the bathroom, part of the reason i use stalls. It didn't hit me until later what he was talking about.
Click to expand...

Man...people talk to me in the bathroom ALL the TIME! I don't know what's up with that. Seriously, 50% of the times I'm spoken to by strangers, when I'm going to bars and such, is while I'm in the bathroom. I don't really mind it, the conversations usually don't make sense anyway.
 
S

Socreges

Banned
Eye contact is one thing. But you must be looking at him in such a way that's either ambiguous or misleading. If you have good control over your expressions, you should be able to nicely impress on him that you aren't interested. A look of indifference is always appropriate and if he continues to stare just give him a "...what?" look.
 
R

RobotChant

Member
A simple "Thank You" with a smile, then turn around and get back to whatever you were doing before he came in. Or you can ask him if he needs "Anything else?", then go back to what you were doing.
 
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