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[Deleted member 4784]

I'm posting this here because it is the most anonymous place that I go to online. *shrug*

So, my boyfriend and I have been together for about a year now. I've never "done" anything with him (or any other guy), but recently I started dropping him hints. We're both kind of conservative and I was planning to do something special for his birthday. Maybe not sex, but heavy petting or something, and I wanted him to know about it. I'm sure you're all thinking I'm the biggest prude in existence right about now and that it is going to haunt me in comments throughout the course of this thread, but whatever; this is the situation.

Anyways, so the other day I showed him my Victoria's Secret catalogue and pointed out to him that they are selling thongs for $10/ea and sets of three for $20. I asked him, "Why don't you buy me a thong? ______'s boyfriend buys her stuff like this all the time." The reaction that I got was far from what I expected and goes to show that I know NOTHING about guys: "Why do you want me to buy you something... and why are you comparing me to ______'s boyfriend?" I felt kind of sad and embarassed for bringing it up, but then he said: "I don't have money for this."

I just thought, WTF? How much is $10 to spend on your girlfriend? That's probably less than a pizza. I was pretty upset by this, so I asked him: "Am I really not worth ten dollars? Come on, now." Then he got a little bit upset: "$10 might be nothing to you because of your daddy, but to people like me, that's real money. I have school and other things to be putting my money towards. What, do you expect me to buy you a bouquet of flowers every day too? If anything, you should be the one offering to buy me books. Blah blah blah."

Of course, he apologized to me later on for the comments he made about my dad, but WTF? I still can't believe $10 isn't worth spending on me. I know that it isn't right to compare my relationship to others and formulate expectations around them either, but I do expect to be BOUGHT something now and then, just to know I'm cared or being thought about. I wasn't even really asking for something for myself, but more along the lines of something for "us" -- from my perspective, at least. Also, he's never ONCE bought me anything, despite the fact that I've already bought gifts for his birthday. Most if not all of my money goes to pay for my dad's medication too, since I'm the one always having to pick it up and my dad no longer has insurance.

Am I just being superficial/selfish? I can't help feeling that this is beyond stingy. Maybe I'm spoiled, but IMO, $10 isn't very much to spending on somebody you care about. I know I've spent more on him, that's for sure.

 

[Socreges]

Your boyfriend is a loser.

And obviously gay. Seriously, one entire year? Are you sure he even has a penis?

 

[demon]

Wow, just one year and he's already going to get some heavy petting? This is the kind of shit I've been missing out on.

 

[Nightbreeze]

hmm well yea $10 is nothing, especially if it's for your gf.

I'm still paying off my credit card from my little road trip me and my gf went on a couple months ago. Gf's are expensive... -_-

 

[FrenchMovieTheme]

not all guys are, but some are. i'm pretty stingy about the money i spend because growing up my family never had much money. we weren't flat out poor and i was never deprived of necessities, but we weren't very well off

ive been w/ my gf for 6 or 7 years (who can recall anyways) and i have never really spent too much money on her. for christmas/birthday/anniversary i do spend a lot of my money, but just for random stuff not so much.

i can see where your bf is coming from. it is hard to understand the value of money if you were never deprived of it. perfect example is my gf's sister. she is spoiled fucking rotten, i could tell you stories regarding her and money but i'll spare it. anyways the point being is that some people can't understand that "just $10 or $20" isn't that simple. when you don't have mom and pops to fall back on and bail you out, then you start thinking more carefully with your money. $10 here, $25 there, etc etc and you are compromising your budget.

just my pov, but i will also say your bf went overboard w/ bringing up your parents. he should know that even if he is thinking that he should keep his mouth shut

 

[LordPhlegm]

Wow. Comparing with another lady's guy. That's cold. That might be why he wasn't happy, 'cause I sure wouldn't be, especially when a person is using that as reasoning for trying to get me to do something.

 

[AstroLad]

______'s boyfriend buys her stuff like this all the time.

That's a really damn annoying thing to say. Plus, you're the law major, shouldn't you be buying him thongs?

 

[Cerebral Palsy]

Your boyfriend sounds like an asshole.

 

[FrenchMovieTheme]

yeah that is another thing i missed. you dont pull the "so and so buys HIS gf stuff" shit. that would piss me off and make me less likely to buy my gf anything. one time long ago when my gf was trying to convince me that we should get another cat and i kept saying no she said "well i only want another animal cause i dont get enough love at home!" and i said oh brother here we go...



p.s. we didn't get the cat












until years later -_-

 

[demon]

Maybe he doesn't feel like buying her thongs because he's not gettin any? If I had a girlfriend and getting "heavy petting" out of her was a special event, I wouldn't give a shit about what she wore underneith her pants.

 

[Monk]

Is he a jew? *badump pish*


But seriously, he is under the impression that you are getting a lot of money or something by that comment about your dad. Also you have to work on your technique for asking a guy stuff, I mean seriously what were you thinking. If you said that to me I would say "fuck you!". And thirdly does he pay for your meals or anything when you guys go out, like ever?

 

[Deleted member 4784]

That's a really damn annoying thing to say. Plus, you're the law major, shouldn't you be buying him thongs?

You're right. =[ Should I get him the pink ones with butterflies or the black with a daisy? :lol

 

[Sean ConnerOWN3D]

Even if she shouldn't have compared him to another girl's boyfriend (which I agree was a stupid move), that's a pretty lame excuse for not buying anything. I mean, you two have been together for a year. It's your friggin' birthday. You're his girlfriend. I would think that $10 wouldn't be going all that far out of the way.

Edit: Whoops, my mistake. I read the birthday thing wrong. ...Yeah, forget all I just said. XD

 

[aoi tsuki]

You've been with him a year and he won't spend a few bucks on you? And he's been with you a year and there's no sex? You two are made for each other.

And hey, i didn't have a lot either growing up, but i like to treat my lady to random gifts every now and then. i can't think of many things more rewarding than seeing the look on her face when i've given a girlfriend something they talked about only casually a few months ago.

 

[Mike Works]

"Why don't you buy me a thong? ______'s boyfriend buys her stuff like this all the time."

 

[Socreges]

You've been with him a year and he won't spend a few bucks on you? And he's been with you a year and there's no sex? You two are made for each other.

Really. How do they not despise each other by now? He won't give her gifts and she won't give him sex. That leaves.... I don't know what that leaves. Nothing?

And hey, i didn't have a lot either growing up, but i like to treat my lady to random gifts every now and then. i can't think of many things more rewarding than seeing the look on her face when i've given a girlfriend something they talked about only casually a few months ago.

Truth. It doesn't even have to be expensive.

 

[etiolate]

Don't do the other bf comparison thing. He sounds broke ass poor or dirt cheap. And don't make it an argument of the sum of money. When I get a girl something, I hate hearing "How much did you spend?" or the wish-they-were-being-sly "You didn't spend too much on me did you?"

And maybe he doesn't like thongs. Boy shorts/undies are much hotter on chicks.

 

[Deleted member 4784]

This is actually a pretty summarized version of our conversation. First I brought up him buying me the thong, then he brought up the issue of money and that he didn't understand why I was wanting him to buy something when I have my own money, which lead to me bringing up how my friend's boyfriend buys her this sort of thing all the time and I didn't understand why he couldn't do the same, etc. I felt pretty bad for it afterwards, because it was wrong of me to compare our relationship to another or insinuate that he had to live up to the standards of my friend's boyfriend, but I wasn't really thinking. I was also kind of frustrated that I was having to dig around for a reason for him to spend $10 on me.

FYI, the girl he was with before me was only interested in sex after marriage... LOL Also, I'm saying "heavy petting", but it isn't like we haven't done things before. Sorry if I feel like leaving the full details of what we have and haven't done out of this. Haha...

 

[Seth C]

Maybe if he thought he'd ever get a chance to see you in these thongs he might purchase them for you? Just a thought.

 

[Cerebral Palsy]

I would dump the guy and find a liberal that will do whatever it takes, even spend $10 dollars, to defile you in all kinds of ways. PM me if you're ever in Salt Lake City.

 

[Smiles and Cries]

Guys are not all stingy your man is.

Spending money on your woman, is a source of pride for most guys.

 

[Mike Works]

This is actually a pretty summarized version of our conversation. First I brought up him buying me the thong, then he brought up the issue of money and that he didn't understand why I was wanting him to buy something when I have my own money, which lead to me bringing up how my friend's boyfriend buys her this sort of thing all the time and I didn't understand why he couldn't do the same, etc. I felt pretty bad for it afterwards, because it was wrong of me to compare our relationship to another or insinuate that he had to live up to the standards of my friend's boyfriend, but I wasn't really thinking. I was also kind of frustrated that I was having to dig around for a reason for him to spend $10 on me.

FYI, the girl he was with before me was only interested in sex after marriage... LOL Also, I'm saying "heavy petting", but it isn't like we haven't done things before. Sorry if I feel like leaving the full details of what we have and haven't done out of this. Haha...

So you suddenly brought up the comparison AFTER he insulted you AND all of a sudden you HAVE done things before sexually? How convenient that the two chronologically mislabled entries of your story were the very two that everyone in this thread were pointing out as your fault/flaws!

I just love coincidence!

 

[Ned Flanders]

Is he a jew? *badump pish*

Stereotypes are fun!! Maybe if he was black he would buy her some watermelon!! Or if he was Muslim he'd get her a suicide jacket!!


Since when did we start looking the other way when it came to anti-semitic comments on this forum?? Shits not funny.

 

[Sean ConnerOWN3D]

Guys are not all stingy your man is.

Spending money on your woman, is a source of pride for most guys.

Sooo true.

 

[Deleted member 4784]

Mike: How is it chronologically mislabeled? I said in my initial posting that I asked him to buy it for me and then mentioned my friend's boyfriend doing the same. If it was my attempt at a saving grace, then I would have mentioned it after he brought up money as vindication, since that would actually be somewhat excusable.

I already know my faults, as I admitted to them in my first post, so I fail to see what you're getting at in claiming I'm trying to hide from my share of blame?

Also, what's your definition of sex? To me it is a penis entering a vagina, to put it bluntly and go back to sex ed. IMO, it is enough for me to discuss what I haven't done here; why should I tell you all about what I have done "in between"? That's really none of your business and I have no idea why you'd even want to know about it. *shrug*

 

[Zensetsu]

OMG all guys are teh stingy because one of them is and they are obviously all teh same !!11!


Nerf Paladins.

 

[Seth C]

Also, what's your definition of sex? To me it is a penis entering a vagina, to put it bluntly and go back to sex ed. IMO, it is enough for me to discuss what I haven't done here; why should I tell you all about what I have done "in between"? That's really none of your business and I have no idea why you'd even want to know about it. *shrug*

It's not an issue of you telling us what you have done. It's an issue of you saying you haven't really done anything with him (read your first post) and then stating that for his birthday you may give him some "heavy petting." The two combined would make one think you hadn't crossed the heavy petting line with him before, don't you think?

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Oh, for the record, you're a cute girl. Pick out some panties. I'll buy them for you...haha.

 

[Cerebral Palsy]

OMG allNerf Paladins.

THEIR DPS SUCKS THOUGH

 

[MC Safety]

I give this thread $6.80.

 

[Smiles and Cries]

I love to spend on women even those that are just friends.
Honestly though women have spent much more money on me because shoot I am poor.
Still it is a source of pride to give stuff to your girl, nothing can beat the smile on her face when you gave something good.

Still some women you should never buy them jack, or they will just suck your pockets dry and move on to the next.

True playas know there is a delicate balance between spoiling your woman and living with constant blue balls.

Give and Take is normal in relationships.
What I spend at Victoria's Secret, I also want to see touch and play with.

Maybe I am giving away too much... I don't want to be kicked out of the Male club.

 

[Ned Flanders]

Also, what's your definition of sex? To me it is a penis entering a vagina, to put it bluntly and go back to sex ed. IMO, it is enough for me to discuss what I haven't done here; why should I tell you all about what I have done "in between"? That's really none of your business and I have no idea why you'd even want to know about it. *shrug*

*looks at avatar*


*connects dots*

 

[norinrad21]

Well my girlfriend spends more money on me than i do on her. I'm not a cheap bastard and she knows when i'm swimming in cash i always take her on cool trips and buy her loads of junk.

She completely understands where i'm coming from and doesn't mind when i haven't bought her anything for a while, hell she calls me her poor student boyfriend.

Buys me clothes, food and sometimes even pays my rent, not to mention she always makes sure theres enough food in my apartment.

I also get to buy Batman volume II and a couple of Japanese GC games on her account as well.

An awesome girlfriend. Does bitch at me when i spend too much time jizzing about anything Nintendo related.

btw your man is a loser, even me the poor student buys my girl stuff whenever i can, even if its with a student loon that i will have to pay through the nose later.

I'm going to hell though, she puts in more into this relationship than i do.

I blame the people of Kyoto

 

[Mike Works]

I fail to see what you're getting at in claiming I'm trying to hide from my share of blame?

Well first you said this:

"I've never "done" anything with him (or any other guy)."

Then you said this:

"LOL Also, I'm saying "heavy petting", but it isn't like we haven't done things before"

You're honestly telling me that I'm out of line for suggesting that stating you've never done anything and then stating it isn't like we haven't done things before looks like conveniently altering the story to avoid the criticism you've been receiving in this thread?

Also, what's your definition of sex? To me it is a penis entering a vagina, to put it bluntly and go back to sex ed. IMO, it is enough for me to discuss what I haven't done here; why should I tell you all about what I have done "in between"? That's really none of your business and I have no idea why you'd even want to know about it. *shrug*

What's my definition of sex? That's really none of your business and I have no idea why you'd even want to know about it. I never said you did or didn't have sex, I said:

"AND all of a sudden you HAVE done things before sexually?"

in regards to your "it isn't like we haven't done things before" quote.

I never asked to know what you have done "in between", and considering you look like olimario with a wig and an infatuation with ponies and, I'm guessing coyotes, I could honestly care less. But hey, I'd gladly "go back to sex ed" if it meant sparing any future possibility of seeing someone like olimario naked on a videogame forum again. Once is more than enough.

^_^;;;;

 

[etiolate]

Am I the only guy who has an aversion to Victoria's Secrets and Fredericks of Hollywood? Whole stores devoted to underwear. I use to walk on the other side of the mall when I passed those stores. All I ever see when I look at those stores is a big neon sign saying "ENTER BONARS".

 

[Zensetsu]

Well my girlfriend spends more money on me than i do on her. I'm not a cheap bastard and she knows when i'm swimming in cash i always take her on cool trips and buy her loads of junk.

She completely understands where i'm coming from and doesn't mind when i haven't bought her anything for a while, hell she calls me her poor student boyfriend.

Buys me clothes, food and sometimes even pays my rent, not to mention she always makes sure theres enough food in my apartment.

I also get to buy Batman volume II and a couple of Japanese GC games on her account as well.

An awesome girlfriend. Does bitch at me when i spend too much time jizzing about anything Nintendo related.

btw your man is a loser, even me the poor student buys my girl stuff whenever i can, even if its with a student loon that i will have to pay through the nose later.

I'm going to hell though, she puts in more into this relation than i do.

I blame the people of Kyoto

He gots himself a sugah mama. Hot damn! :lol

 

[Smiles and Cries]

He gots himself a sugah mama. Hot damn! :lol

Not very hard women are amazingly generous when they love you
I got a car once as a gift I just could not keep it I did not love her and I felt bad

 

[fart]

i'd say this is the best thread ever, but it's not. i'm glad that you want to share, and i hope you share later when you have more interesting things to talk about, but jesus h christ, lady.

oh man, this shit is taking forever to compile.

 

[Cerebral Palsy]

I DON'T WANT NO PART OF YO TIRED ASS COUNTRY CLUB YA FREAK BITCH

 

[Deleted member 4784]

Mike, do you expect me to go into full detail about every single thing that I have ever done with my boyfriend or something? I'm not the type of person to talk about everything I have ever done in a relationship of that personal of a nature; only of what I haven't done. TBH, I'm really baffled as to why you want to know so badly what I have and haven't done with my boyfriend. If you really think there's nothing else outside of "sex" in the strictest sense, then I'm afraid you really are lacking in imagination...

Also, forgive me if I don't feel like arguing about specific context in a rant that's not even about my sexual history (or lack thereof), but about my boyfriend not wanting to buy me a thong. Do you give the syntax of all my posts on these boards as much scrutiny, or just those in the course of this thread? Either way, I'm flattered enough to award you the courtesy of continuing with whatever assumptions you may have. I know more about my relationship and the extent of what goes on in it than you do; I fail to see why coming to premature assumptions about it is an issue of such passion to you. I'm not going to be goaded into going into that kind of detail within this topic.

 

[fart]

Give and Take is normal in relationships.
What I spend at Victoria's Secret, I also want to see touch and play with.

Maybe I am giving away too much... I don't want to be kicked out of the Male club.

I THINK HE'S TRYING TO SAY THAT HE WEARS THE PANTIES THAT HE BUYS FROM VICTORIA'S SECRET, GUYS.

YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO, BOYS.

 

[Smiles and Cries]

I THINK HE'S TRYING TO SAY THAT HE WEARS THE PANTIES THAT HE BUYS FROM VICTORIA'S SECRET, GUYS.

YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO, BOYS.

Blah
been there done that

You know my ex has pics of me wearing her panties on my head. Spiderman like.
It was funny at the time...

I did wear my girl's thong once because I lost a bet with her... Shoot I am not ashamed of that we had great sex. I have good humorous relationships with women, it is easy to get a woman to do anything for you if you keep the mood relaxed with a little joke.

Love is fun... I miss it

 

[J2 Cool]

I have to know the details of what you've done to assess the situation. I'm sorry, but you don't leave the fingerprints at a crime scene out of the investigation. Have you french kissed him yet? Has he seen your underwear before?

But anyway, yeah, $10 is stingy, but being compared to other guys is not exactly pleasant. Just a common disagreement. Don't think on it too much. Unless he's got a job and is well off but isn't devoted, but that's hard for any of us to make that assumption on a simple argument as such.

 

[Mike Works]

Mike, do you expect me to go into full detail about every single thing that I have ever done with my boyfriend or something? I'm not the type of person to talk about everything I have ever done in a relationship of that personal of a nature; only of what I haven't done. TBH, I'm really baffled as to why you want to know so badly what I have and haven't done with my boyfriend.

Alright, here's the deal. By the time I re-check this thread (which could be in minutes, could be in hours), I expect you to produce a quote displaying where I've stated that I want to know (so badly) what you have and haven't done with your boyfriend. You've accused me of this twice now, even though I've clarified multiple times that all I've done is point out how you conveniently altered two aspects of your original story to deflect the criticism you endured for those two aspects.

It's very, very important that you produce what I'm asking here, as I'm going to have to get rid of your account if you can't. But it shouldn't be hard since I've apparently done it multiple times now, so don't panic. If you do start to get nervous about it though, here's a hint:

Spoiler

You're fucked.

 

[MC Safety]

This thread seems like it needs a little bit of sweet lovin'.

 

[El_Victor]

Mike, do you expect me to go into full detail about every single thing that I have ever done with my boyfriend or something?

This is gaf, no?

 

[B'z-chan]

Current hole with my girl friend: $12,985 in three years. Yeah women can be expensive but if you love them it makes all the difference. Show that you care or just surprising them with a small gift. It goes a long way.

Waychel i'm sorry about your bf. But as men were all just a little bit stingy about money. But thats no excuse for him getting upset and bitching you out for it. Cut him off for a while, he'll be dying at the choke till he goes and buys those thongs.

 

[BuddyC]

Going by what you've said, you come off as a little spoiled, not to mention jealous of your friend's relationship, he sounds more-than-just-a-tad clueless and you're both relatively new to/lacking experience with this whole relationship thing.

 

[Deleted member 4784]

I have to know the details of what you've done to assess the situation. I'm sorry, but you don't leave the fingerprints at a crime scene out of the investigation. Have you french kissed him yet? Has he seen your underwear before?

But anyway, yeah, $10 is stingy, but being compared to other guys is not exactly pleasant. Just a common disagreement. Don't think on it too much. Unless he's got a job and is well off but isn't devoted, but that's hard for any of us to make that assumption on a simple argument as such.

Yes and yes.

We didn't get into a huge fight and he did apologize to me about the comments he made about my dad. I also apologized to him about bringing up my friend's relationship. We're both pretty much over it and I don't expect him to buy anything for me. I still wish he would, but I care about him more than I do about thongs... LOL

 

[Hooker]

$10 hahaha


I'm broke as hell (another college student who has trouble making ends meet) and I wouldn't even have problems buying boxers for my mates. (wow, that sounds really bad )

I reckon it depends on what your background is. My parents are probably what you'd consider wealthy so I grew up with the message that giving stuff to people is good. I mean, when you've bought something which has you eating bread and water for a month you might think that that's crazy. But once you see the eyes of the person on the receiving end, it's all worth it. At least, that's my point of view.

But you had it coming after the "____'s boyfriend does it!" comment though. That's COLD!!You probably would have gotten a "go suck his dick then" out of me

 

[Rorschach]

I just looked in my copy of Victoria's Secret (I shop for my heart entrance panties there) and there are no 10 dollar panties!

PS: what's the point of VS if there's no putting out?