But nobody argued that at any point. Nobody once said that the quality of the writing or the acting didn't matter. It obviously does, and even in the case of the conversation all those years ago between me and my wife that sparked this side-discussion, she admitted that the show isn't very good, and the character wasn't written very well. Representation doesn't EXCUSE that - but that doesn't mean it's weightless. You just said as much with your Windu example. And when that's basically all they're fuckin' offering you, you make do. It's not like she didn't do, as you did, and figure out her own ways into identification with white men at the lead of stories that intrigued her. Of course she did. She had to.
That's the point. There's an intrinsic worth to inclusivity and wider representation. Yes, those roles should be well written and well acted, too. But lets say you're a fan of superheroes, and all they're giving you is fuckin Luke Cage in the '70s - yeah, you might still like Spidey better. You might still prefer Batman. But chances are you there's some level of appreciation at the relative ease at which you can say "that guy's MINE" when you decided to enter that universe.
That's what you were "Ehh-ing," even as you thought you were ehh-ing bad writing and lazy tokenism.
Rey's not even a poor character, so the Ehh-ing in that direction from multiple corners of the fandom is out-of-place, period. Her being a woman doesn't excuse those character flaws, of course not. But her being a woman shouldn't mean those character flaws suddenly weigh 3 tons each when for most other male heroes, they're however light they need to be in order to give some shine to the awesome stuff that scratches our wish-fulfillment itches.