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Bathing and Sleeping with your Son.
- Thread starter Bogeyker
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MrAngryFace
Banned
Yesterday.
Spiritreaver
Member
I knew this was coming, a warning right at the creation of the topic would have been too late. you could just feel the flames and jokes aplenty.
AlphaSnake
...and that, kids, was the first time I sucked a dick for crack
...
fennec fox
ferrets ferrets ferrets ferrets FERRETS!!!
Now that's how you make your debut on an Internet forum! None of this "Hi, my name is Bogeyker" or "Who here likes the DS" crap!
I did expect a few snide remarks but then again I suppose it all depends on how people have been raised. I was born to parents in the hippie generation so I guess they were more prone to showing us loving acts than say those that weren't part of the movement. I remember bathing and sleeping with my dad for many years and no lines were ever crossed. It was just a simple bond between father and son much like say going golfing with your son is. I do respect my wife though and can acknowledge that maybe the time has come to give my son more freedom. I just see things differently than she does since she was brought up in a very conservative family that rarely if ever showed loving acts to one another.
Would breaking the bond slowly over time be better than say the cold turkey approach?
Would breaking the bond slowly over time be better than say the cold turkey approach?
fennec fox
ferrets ferrets ferrets ferrets FERRETS!!!
Bogeyker said:
Does your kid have any friends, and do they know this? Is your son easily influenced? I remember being 10 years old, and my friends would tell me I'm gay over the stupidest shit. Imagine how your son feels behind your back. If it's natural, then cool, but I must say, he probably doesn't have many friends or you live in Bumfuck, Idaho.Bogeyker said:
Spiritreaver
Member
Well, I'm definitely a young person, and I've got no child. I also suspect that's the main reason you're not getting a single mature response with this thread. No one can even fathom such a thing in a way that isn't perverted or wrong.
Anyways, logically, I'd go with easing things out. It could be kind of weird of the kid doesn't quite understand why his dad is acting differently out of nowhere. I guess you need to find ways to get accustomed to sleeping on his own. In what manner you know best for your son.
I don't know much else to say really, as I'd be talking out of my ass in any other case. Good luck to you though.
Anyways, logically, I'd go with easing things out. It could be kind of weird of the kid doesn't quite understand why his dad is acting differently out of nowhere. I guess you need to find ways to get accustomed to sleeping on his own. In what manner you know best for your son.
I don't know much else to say really, as I'd be talking out of my ass in any other case. Good luck to you though.
Well DarthWufei I should clarify that it's not like I sleep or bathe with him every night out of the week. It could be 2-3 times doing them combined and there might even be a week when we can't get together. I do agree that if I go the cold turkey route that my son might feel that I am rejecting him which is the farthest thing from the truth. I was doing likewise with my daughter but my wife felt that 8 years old was her cut off point due to her being a female and myself being a male. I'm of the belief that the child is nurtured during this process and in a sense develops a bonding with the parent that can solidify the overall relationship between all parties in the long run.
Do you ever think about the kind of psychological problems your children will possibly have someday? Do you realize that both of your kids could possibly go to school and think about this ALL day? Good grief, cut the cord and apologize to them 5 years from now. Which reminds me...your son will be 15 in FIVE years. Dude, I got my N64 at 11 and I was bragging about Mortal Kombat Trilogy.Bogeyker said:
Dude, take a step back and think about what you've done. Go to time out.
fennec fox
ferrets ferrets ferrets ferrets FERRETS!!!
I'm sorry, but your problem will not find a solution here. In fact, your situation has already become this evening's joke material, and this thread will probably be remembered as one of the most extraordinary Junior Member posts in all of GAF history. Sorry.
To avoid embarrassment in the future, you may want to consult a child psychologist before posting about your easily misunderstood and potentially illegal personal life on a video-game message board. Assuming you aren't trolling, which is certainly a possibility.
To avoid embarrassment in the future, you may want to consult a child psychologist before posting about your easily misunderstood and potentially illegal personal life on a video-game message board. Assuming you aren't trolling, which is certainly a possibility.
i'd recommend you get the opinions of other parents who had a similar upbringing as yours and/or parents who are raising their children as you're raising your son. Nothing personal, but OT really isn't the place for this, especially seeing as how most people here don't even have kids (i don't). i'm sure most people would say you're some kind of freak, but i don't think there's a clear cut answer as to what works and what doesn't in a situation like this.
Spiritreaver
Member
Yes, it's true, people are thinking of it as being in that way. The term "sleeping with" is used to mean one thing more often than other these days. I in a sense slept in the same bed or room as my mom for the longest, but it was just a comfort thing. I had still not grown accustomed to sleeping in my own room, in the dark, with the noises of the night.
It's more like sleeping in the same room with someone, then it is "sleeping with". Unless you by chance do more than just sleep, but also take physical interaction with this as well. Then I can't really relate.
Bathing, I don't know, but I do feel that for either, you should move on and get your son used to being on his own. Just for the sake of him being a growing boy and soon he's going to hit puberty and things are just going to go awry if this is still going on.
It's more like sleeping in the same room with someone, then it is "sleeping with". Unless you by chance do more than just sleep, but also take physical interaction with this as well. Then I can't really relate.
Bathing, I don't know, but I do feel that for either, you should move on and get your son used to being on his own. Just for the sake of him being a growing boy and soon he's going to hit puberty and things are just going to go awry if this is still going on.
Sad to say, I know of someone (this kid I went to school with) who's parents didn't like the way the school system taught sex-ed so the parents decided to teach him themselves.
How did they teach him you ask?
By all showering together (mom, dad and him). This was in high school, from my understanding.
True story. I wish I was making it up.
How did they teach him you ask?
By all showering together (mom, dad and him). This was in high school, from my understanding.
True story. I wish I was making it up.
even with it being not sexual, I still think its really disturbing. Just thinking of having a memory of bathing with my mom or dad sends shudders down my back. It just seems like you might be giving you kids a lot of disturbing emotional scars, or just a ton of repressed memories.
Id at least stop for you Wife, because i bet that it has crossed her mind that she married a man who might be into incest pedophilia.
Id at least stop for you Wife, because i bet that it has crossed her mind that she married a man who might be into incest pedophilia.
My mother stopped breast feeding me when I was close to two years old. I bathed with my dad until I was 5, I think. My parents pounded into my skull that drugs, alcohol (in large quantities), and smoking are all bad. I got my ass beat for smoking cigarettes, so I never really thought about drugs nor do I care to right now. I'm very proud of my parents teaching me right from wrong, because I've become a very successful young man, and a lot of them is due to them. I give them "props" for keeping me on the right path.Bogeyker said:
Never did I once have something I thought about all day from what my parents done. Divorce and fighting are the only things that hampered me growing up, however, at its core, we children (my brothers and I) were what was most important. We never got mistreated in such a way. Believe it or not, you may not even realize this is mistreating your children...but....talk to them 20 years from now, and see how they feel.
You, sir, are in need of some psychoanalysis, counseling, and perhaps jailtime for letting your kid think about these things day to day. I'm being a dick about this not because you're a dumbass (which you can be a very bright individual behind that kiddy-loving self of yours), I'm being a dick because of ethics and your childrens' mental welfare, and what could possibly lead them on to be pedophiles themselves someday.
Think, man, think. What lies before you in the future are social norms. Believe it when it happens.
I still pray you're not being serious.
Spiritreaver
Member
Catalyst said:
I think you live up the "Junior Member" title moreso than Bogeyker, personally.
Meh, you really should post this on a forum dedicated to such problems, or perhaps talk to people more knowledgable in the subject. No one here is going to entire understand. Not that I think what you're doing is right in a sense, I think it is also time to teach your son to be on his own at night and what not. But I think you're going to get a much better answer with someone specialized in the area an understands what's going on.
But man, how I do admire you keeping your cool. But, I do hope we all can get a clear mind on what it is and isn't appropriate to post I guess.
From what I can tell my son has absolutely no qualms whatsoever about this whole scenario. Often times it is him that willingly brings me the soap, sail boats or massage oils and leads me by the hand I might even add, into the bedroom or bath tub. To him it is no different than me taking him to his soccer game or playing video games with him. Sadly the same cannot be said for the vast majority of society it seems with regards to this behaviour.
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