Dating a woman who already has kids.

Sub_Level

Sub_Level

wants to fuck an Asian grill.
Would you do it? Have you done it?

This hot chick said she'd go out with me. But she's got 2 young kiddos. I don't know man. With 1 I could maybe deal, but 2? I don't know. Its like being put into a multiplayer match mid-game and my team's losing.

Discuss. (or just spam cuck memes, up to you)
 
This is probably going to make me sound really bad, but whatever.

In my experience, I've found that single moms put out much faster than others. So when I'm in between relationships and just looking for fun, they're my go to. If you're going for something with no strings attached, I say go for it. But if you're looking for more of a long term relationship, then you have to factor in that right from the beginning you won't be her top priority and her time will be limited, so you'll have to be ok with that fact.
 
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Did it. For many years. Kinda sucks.

Basically be ready to be Dad to these kids. And the kids will always come before you no matter what. Doesn't matter. At first it will be cool, maybe hang with the kids once in a while but the lady still gives you time. Kids are at arms length. Its fun, you play with em and its all cool. But once it gets more serious you gotta watch the kids, buy em shit, take em with you on all dates (Movies become more expensive, dinners more expensive, etc...) and alone time becomes more scarce.

And then you get attached to the kids, you like em, you are growing into a dad, and boom she fucks off and you never see the kids again and that relationship you put time in is in the trash and you never existed.

Now if you want a pre built family and are ready to settle down then its the perfect set up. avoid the diapers and waking up at 2 in the morning. Your good to go. But if you want some fun times and aren't sure if anything is serious its probably not for you.
 
I've done it twice but both relationships were pretty short so I didn't develop much relationship with the kid. It was a little strange for me, but I'm sure other people have more experience than I had. I will say though that once you get a certain age the expectations of finding a partner that doesn't have kids and isn't divorced get smaller and smaller and kind of just have to accept that those things are probably going to be part of the equation.
 
After a certain age you are doomed to go after failed marriages unless you can somehow find a woman that didn't pop a kid out. That or you can go for college girls that aren't insane. Good fucking luck!
Xaero Testosterone said:
This is probably going to make me sound really bad, but whatever.

In my experience, I've found that single moms put out much faster than others. So when I'm in between relationships and just looking for fun, they're my go to. If you're going for something with no strings attached, I say go for it. But if you're looking for more of a long term relationship, then you have to factor in that right from the beginning you won't be her top priority and her time will be limited, so you'll have to be ok with that fact.
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Username DOES NOT check out.
 
Xaero Testosterone said:
This is probably going to make me sound really bad, but whatever.

In my experience, I've found that single moms put out much faster than others. So when I'm in between relationships and just looking for fun, they're my go to. If you're going for something with no strings attached, I say go for it. But if you're looking for more of a long term relationship, then you have to factor in that right from the beginning you won't be her top priority and her time will be limited, so you'll have to be ok with that fact.
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He's not wrong, but you have to realize these women are putting out mad quick because they're lonely and desperate and hoping they can bait you into staying and becoming daddy. If you can do that with a clear conscience then go for it. I personally wouldn't advise it. It's fucked for the kids and the woman. The kids see a revolving door of guys and the mom realizes she'll be forever alone unless she can get some beta to stay with her.

No offense pramod pramod :D
 
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Nope!



Unless Emma Roberts had kids, then I totally would.
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I've dated 3 women that had kids already and each situation was different .

1. Dad wasn't around , kid was great . Why I didn't try really hard to stick around for that one I don't know
2. Dad was around , he was okay, kid was okay, mom was a raving lunatic who swore up and down I was cheating if I didn't call her back in like a min .
3. Mom was cool but treated 2 of her 3 kids like sh*t because she apparently hated their father and the other one was from a different father that died and she treated him okay. Noped out of that one after a few buss nuts.. she was bad tho..

You really have to evaluate the situation . Like if the father is around is he an issue? If he isn't is she bitter about that? Do you like the kid ? Dating someone with an obnoxious f*ck trophy can go south real fast.
 
Hard pass for me. A woman with kids has every incentive to put up a good image at the beginning to hide whatever may have caused the split. I know relationships go bad and I know deadbeat dads exist, but ladies with kids from a former relationship are a huge red flag.
 
If you don't wanna to have kids, it is a good option a woman that already have. But if you wanna, is going to be an extra costs.

Well, see that way, women is like a RPG character. If have a finite amount of points to distribute. So, if she have kids, so she should have qualities to counter balance.
 
This is going to be a black pill kind of thread. It's depressing, but I'm glad Gaffers are addressing the reality of the situation.

Sometimes, bad things have happened to people, maybe not even by their own hand. Having friends that are single moms, I really, really am empathetic to that struggle.

That said, what random guy is going to want to take care of... well, someone else's family, versus the life experience of making his own?

Don't get me wrong, adoptive dads that wander into this situation, and step up, I find to be amazing. If that works for you, and you will have a happy life doing that, awesome, all around.

That said, most men aren't going to want a ready-made family, and as someone else pointed out, such a thing is really inevitable. That's a completely fair stance to have.
 
Tough call. Best thing to do is talk to her about expectations and what "dating" her entails.

Her kids a may be a joy and become a great part of your life. Maybe you will like being "pseudo dad"?
 
How big are her tits OP? Obviously small since you like Asian grills but I still gotta ask.
 
I've never done it but would be prepared to if I found myself single at this point (early 30s). As a father I couldn't really knock someone for being a mother, though beware the crazy fucking ex.

Again I haven't experienced that, but I know three couples that have each spent upwards of 20k in legal bills over custody and random shit like that. One friend of mine is considering adopting a baby that isn't even related to her husband because it's her step son's half sister, all because her husband's ex is so drugged out she's going to probably be dead soon. So yeah, take the lay of the land
 
Sub_Level said:
Would you do it? Have you done it?

This hot chick said she'd go out with me. But she's got 2 young kiddos. I don't know man. With 1 I could maybe deal, but 2? I don't know. Its like being put into a multiplayer match mid-game and my team's losing.

Discuss. (or just spam cuck memes, up to you)
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Find out if her kids have any marketable skill. Child actor potential? Budding athletic skills to possibly be pro athletes? Possible high iq smart as fuck rocket scientists? If yes, marry that bitch and adopt her kids.

If they are dumb as fuck, or average at best, channel your inner stormtrooper and tell that trick to...


eX98M4Y.gif
 
Xaero Testosterone said:
This is probably going to make me sound really bad, but whatever.

In my experience, I've found that single moms put out much faster than others. So when I'm in between relationships and just looking for fun, they're my go to. If you're going for something with no strings attached, I say go for it. But if you're looking for more of a long term relationship, then you have to factor in that right from the beginning you won't be her top priority and her time will be limited, so you'll have to be ok with that fact.
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This is 100% true.
 
I came into this thread thinking no way, but I honestly don't think it's that big a deal.

My issue though would be fearing the woman would want to be serious straight away. You don't know how much you like somebody until a few months of dating but those kids might create extra baggage, extra guilt on your part if you wanted to break up after getting close to them (which you'll naturally have to otherwise it definitely won't work).
 
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haxan7 said:
I've been doing it for almost 2 years and still haven't met her kids.
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Really? Damn not sure if that's cold or cool.
Sounds more like friends with benefits thing, are you not interested in the kids?
For me it would it would be how old the kids are and how into the relationship you are and how far you want to take it.
I would but tell her no kids for the start of the relationship to see if your really into her and take never go to her place.
 
I normally don't, but I once met this really cute girl in the elevator of my building. She was with her daughter, and she smiled at me and everything. We really hit it off - it was love at first sight for both of us. It took me a while to make my move, but I just knocked on her door one late night, and the rest is history. I don't know what came over me, but I guess I was a bit worked up after murdering those guys in the subway. HAHAHA!
 
DESTROYA said:
Really? Damn not sure if that's cold or cool.
Sounds more like friends with benefits thing, are you not interested in the kids?
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It's probably kind of cold on my part. It was casual hooking up for like a year then just turned into doing more and more things together. I don't know what I'm doing honestly.
 
Nope, I couldn't do it, maybe if I was a single dad with a kid with me but I just feel weird about raising someone's else's kid. Some guys can do that and if you can I give you props but me I just can't, maybe just friends with benefits type of deal that's it.
 
You're a cuck. Imagine raising somebody elses sperm. Plus they're probably more likely to cheat on your if they're younger since they obviously can't keep their legs shut. No young woman wants kids.
 
haxan7 said:
It's probably kind of cold on my part. It was casual hooking up for like a year then just turned into doing more and more things together. I don't know what I'm doing honestly.
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At least your being honest. Maybe it's time for the next step? I mean 2 years is a long time to be with someone so there has to be something that makes you stick around.
or is just the sex
 
The biggest problem is that modern women are conditioned/socialized to put their kids before their man, which I think is part of why divorce rates are so high. It is the case with men too, but I don't think men are as guilty of ignoring their partner in favor of their children.

Divorced women with kids are a guaranteed no-go zone. There is a reason she is divorced.
 
I married one. She only had one and he was 2 when we started dating, she was 23. The biggest issue is always going to be the ex, you wouldn't believe the amount of bullshit you have to deal with if they're around. I've been in Keegan's life for 8 years, he doesn't remember a time when I wasn't there and he calls me dad. The ex doesn't like that he calls me dad and is just a jealous, narcissistic, deadbeat cunt. Tried to keep Keegan from going on vacation with us last summer when we were going to several national parks and Disneyland.

My wife has a friend with three kids that is recently divorced, and I'm not sure about her. She got married right out of high school, lost her virginity to her husband, and was a stay at home mom. Apparently the husband was cheating on her throughout the marriage and she only found out at the end. Anyway, because she spent her 20s raising the kids and being married she didn't get to party. Now, she tries to get my wife to go out with her every weekend to party. She says she's only been with her husband, but from what I've seen she seems to be putting on this innocent front. Her daughter sent a video to my wife on a Saturday morning a several weeks ago where they were bringing some young dude home. My wife didn't hear from her for a month after that, she messaged my wife last weekend to go out.

If you're prepared to deal with the baggage that comes with it, you can find a keeper, or you can find someone like my wife's friend that seems to just be trying to fuck a new dude every weekend.
 
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