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WCW Monday Nitro 10/9/2000
Nitro down under! Nitro is from Brisbane!
TO THE BACK. A limo arrives. Jeff Jarret dressed as surfer Sting.
Kangaroos, koalas, other marsupials. It's Australia, guys!
Elix Skipper vs Rey Mysterio Jr.
No Juvi or Konnan. I wonder if Juvi had been fired for getting stoned, naked, and attacking cops. This could be fun. It's weird seeing a huge and hot crowd again. It's like TNA running the Impact Zone for 8 months and then doing the UK shows. Slingshot powerbomb to the floor is one of the first moves Prime Time does. Elix tried his tight rope rana, but it was a botch and a half. He just fell forward. If Rey hadn't had his legs wrapped in the ropes, that could have been bad. As it was, he got Prime Time's balls in his face for longer than he would have liked, I'm sure.
Springboard somersault to the floor from Rey. Did X-Pac invent the Bronco Buster? If so, fuck him. Torrie attacks Tygress. The cameras miss Rey getting murdered on the apron. Overdrive. Prime Time wins completely clean over Rey Jr. I'd like to see what happened to Rey on the apron. It looked like it hurt.
TO THE BACK. Shane is talking with the the Boogie Knights. They say you can say "franchised" in Australia. The NBT head to the arena. David Flair arrives in a blood mobile.
Mike Sanders says he's the new commissioner. He books a Down Underwear match between Torrie and Tygress. Both ladies will start out in safari outfits and the one left in their underwear is the loser. "Did someone just goose dis guy?" Cat comes out. Cat was going to whoop some ass, but he decides that they should work together to book a great show. Then he brings out MIA. That isn't a good celebration, Cat. Cat and Sanders are going to have a dance off. SWERVE. The faces attack! Cat vs Sanders is booked for later tonight. I think. "Meet me, shit head" is a challenge, right?
TO THE BACK. Disco and Alex are dancing in mirrors. Stacy arrives. Sting Jarrett heads to catering.
Boogie Knights vs NBT WCW Tag Team Championships
I can't believe they're still using the Berlyn style music. WCW clearly has no sense of rankings for title matches. Regardless, I hope they win just so I can see the duck wearing the title and Alex Wright dancing. Alex Wright is a competent wrestler. Giant double hip toss to Disqo. Seanton Bomb was countered by Alex crotching O'Haire. HUGE missile drop kick from Alex. The NBT do Rock N' Roll Express spots. O'Haire tags with the back of his foot. Weird. These dancing fools just might pull off the win! Ref bump. Chartbuster! New Champions! Sanders comes out and disqualifies the Boogie Knights. The NBT come out and beat them up. Match is now being restarted. Thrillers retain. Oh, did WCW not learn from Dusty Finishes?
TO THE BACK. Stacy heads to the ring. Goldberg arrives on a motorcycle that he rode over the ocean on.
TO THE KOALA SANCTUARY! The YAKS played with marsupials.
TO THE BACK. Buy the Stinger Mastercard, now!
Mark Madden is in the ring and brings out Stacy Keibler. Should she have been on a 14 hour flight while she's 2 months pregnant? Mark Madden is sickeningly fat.
Stacy won't reveal the father. She says David has to stop this crazy shit. Madden says maybe Stacy was drunk or can't remember who the father is. Or that she's been with so many men that he can't remember one. What the fuck, is this Tenay in a fat suit? David comes out. He ducks her hug. David wants her to take a blood test. But we know who the mother is, numb nuts. Crowbar jives his way out to chill him out. David attacks him. This brings out Mike Awesome.
TO THE BACK. Kangaroo Jack Tygress heads to the ring. Jungle Torrie Wilson heads to the ring. Paula talks with "Sting". Not nWo Sting or Fake Sting, but "Sting". He's going to sign autographs in the ring. Showtime (Anytime sucks compared to HBO Go)!
Tygress vs Torrie Wilson Down Underwear Match
Does anyone in Australia say "down under"? I would think this is kind of offensive to these people, much like a Queen's Guard match or something. STUFF BUSTER! And then She rubs Torrie's face in her stuff. Torrie is missing her pants, Tygress is missing her shirt. Tygress wins, but we don't get a shot of Torrie because Shane covered her up. Konnan saves Tygress post match. Konnan actually does a pretty hilarious Shane impression.
TO THE BACK. Vito chats with Mike "Mr. Stromboli holder" Sanders. Vito will fight anyone.
"Sting" comes out to sign some autographs. He makes an announcement: When Jeff Jarrett beats him at Halloween Havoc, he will retire. The real Sting descends from the rafters. It's a Sting off! Stevie keeps insisting that Jeff is 5 inches shorter than Sting. "Sting" flexes at Sting and we've got a donnybrook!
Madden claims the real Sting is actually Jeff Farmer, the fake Sting. "Stinger" splash! Suplex through a table. Sting no sells that shit. Sting hated being in WCW so much at that point that he wouldn't even sell for himself! Deathlock on "Sting".
TO THE BACK. Steiner says he'll take care of Sting.
Mike Sanders/Kevin Nash vs The Cat/Booker T
Nash is in Outsiders red. How did Booker get into Australia? Did WCW smuggle him in? Is Australia like Canada when it comes to to not letting criminals in, even if the crime was decades earlier? It's a pretty good policy to have, I think. It's a shame Canada can't get Joey Diaz, though. Would Australia cheer for two black dudes over two white dudes? Honest question. I'm not well versed in the plight of the Aboriginal people besides knowing that weren't exactly treated very well for a long time. Lol, a dude at a WCW show in Australia was wearing a Detroit Red Wings jersey. I don't know why that is funny to me, but it is. Cat pins Sanders with a kick in the mouth. Then Cat gets in the face of Sam Grecco in the front row. Steiner wipes out Booker in the ring while Sanders attacked Cat. Steiner calls out Sting.
TO THE BACK. Paula tells David he could have hurt Stacy and the baby. David challenges Awesome to a hardcore match. Goldberg gets pumped up. Paula is now with Vito. Vito's mouth running got him booked against Goldberg. He ain't sweating it. May the best man win.
Big Vito vs Goldberg
Vito attacks right away. Sting agreed to face Steiner tonight. SPEAR. Jackhammer. Two move squash from Goldberg. 4-0. After the match, JTB attacks Vito with a kendo stick. Goldberg comes back. The awesome throwing reverse pumphandle slam, spear, and jackhammer. The ref makes a pin, so the streak grows to 5. Kronik come out and stare from the stage.
TO THE BACK. A Mercedes pulls up, but we don't get to see who was inside.
Mike Awesome vs David Flair Hardcore Match
This doesn't go too well for David. Dive over the railing. The rail of PAIIIINNN. I don't know what is so wrong with the Bee Gees. They've got some fucking jams. Really hilarious "Awesome" chant, but with a THICK Australian accent. Just sounded funny. I'm not surprised that Awesome's knees were torn to shit since he was a huge dude constantly flying around and landed on them for pretty much every move he did. 3 top rope moves a match all landing on his knees. A tope where his knees usually crashed into the floor. The Running Awesome Bomb. The standing splash. Slingshot shoulder block. His knees took a pounding. I must be getting older because when I see guys doing flips or jumping to the floor and landing on their feet, all I can think about is how bad that would make my knees feel. Awesome wins.
TO THE BACK. RIC FLAIR was in the Mercedes!
David wasn't done with Awesome, so now he's going to pay. Ric saves his son from an Awesome Bomb over the top. "Peace out, baby!" Ric checks on his son, but David will have nothing to do with him.
TO THE BACK. Gunns asks Kwee Wee for a new outfit. Lance drags her off. This shit is a wrestling match, not a beauty contest.
Lance Storm vs Konnan Canadian Heavyweight Championship
Prime Time is checking on the ring because Lance knew there was a local ring crew and after their debacle at the Olympics, he wasn't taking chances. The top rope was 1 inch too low. Konnan stole Christian's sunglasses! Lol, Konnan is trying to wrestle. Bless his kidney. Looks terrible, but it's the first time he's tried in 4 years. Lance had that same goofy stomp that the Bulldog had. I don't get it. I can't see how it would hurt any worse than just stomping or kicking a guy. Shane gets in the ring and attacks, but Lance only gets two with a Northern Lights. Maple Leaf for the win.
TO THE BACK. Sting and Steiner get pumped up.
Sting vs Scott Steiner
Jeff is now the ref. Sting should be disqualified for attacking the ref, but WCW doesn't give a fuck about DQs anymore. Steiner's spinning belly to belly has always been one of my favorite moves. I wonder what Steiner's real facial injuries were to make him wear his mask. He was out of matches for a bit before the Goldberg angle and I have a hard time believing WCW would keep up something like that unless he needed it for real. Billy Sliverman comes to the ring and is laid out immediately. Sting makes a comeback. Steiner's mask if off. Pipe shot. That thing is clearly rubber. It never makes a sound when he throws it on the floor, it bends when he hits people with it, it's bounced and hit HIM many times without him flinching, it couldn't even break the Disco Duck. Scott makes the pin, and Jeff makes the count while half out of the ring. Cat and Booker miss their cue, so Jeff stops at 2 waiting for them to show up. Cat drags Jeff off and Booker is now out in a ref shirt. Sting wins after a side kick into the Deathdrop.
Show was fine, mostly because they were in front of a wrestling starved crowd in a huge arena where people were HAPPY to have WCW in town.