Cyberpunkd
Member
Quite the opposite, as a father I can tell you I am amazed the number of times kids bump into things, cry for 30 seconds, and carry on. They are really build like tanks, the danger comes from cables, electric plugs, etc.
I hate kids
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Makoto-Yuki
Banned
i can't stand them. i hated having to look after my little cousins. i will never have kids of my own. not only because i find them infuriating but the world could do with keeping population down and also i like spending money i work for. as soon as you have kids then you can kiss it all goodbye. my parents want to be grandparents...nah sorry that's not happening.
all i need are my cats
all i need are my cats
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Stilton Disco
Member
Your brain is meant to rewire itself to switch from self preservation mode to parent mode either during pregnancy for women, or after you're introduced to your child as a man.
It doesn't always work mind you, but parenthood in the vast majority of cases really does alter your perception and attitudes towards children, both your own and usually by extension other peoples.
It's similar to how the part of the brain that controls empathy doesn't start to develop fully until around 12.
It doesn't always work mind you, but parenthood in the vast majority of cases really does alter your perception and attitudes towards children, both your own and usually by extension other peoples.
It's similar to how the part of the brain that controls empathy doesn't start to develop fully until around 12.
eot
Banned
I don't think I could ever have children. Despite being a fairly social person I need my quiet time alone away from people. As a kid I was a night owl because I needed those hours when everyone else was asleep. Having a kid around and never having a moment of peace, I think it would actually drive me insane, or I would just leave and feel guilty about it.
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Dr.D00p
Member
lock2k
Banned
You're not obligated to like them. I get it.I don't feel anything..even with the kids of my friends...
My friends instead they are always happy when they see kids,they speak with them,plays,etc..
And if they are newborn they want to pick them up,they ask questions to parents..and we have to spend at least 40min speaking of kids...
And i am behind waiting like this:
I'm a sociopath?
However, the bond I have with my daughter is the best thing of my life. She is like a mirror of my mind. It's just the most awesome feeling ever. Can't wait to have a second one. But it was always a call to me, I always knew, even when I was a child that I would have kids one day. There was no pressure from anyone. Some people are just born to do it.
Cyberpunkd
Member
Slings and Arrows
Banned
I love kids, but i couldn't eat a whole one.
Elektro Demon
Banned
I avoid kids whenever possible.
NeoIkaruGAF
Gold Member
There's no way to skip that part of development, and having been a kid myself, I'm grateful not everyone hates them. Thinking back, I can only appreciate how patient and understanding grownups have been to me at the time.
I like them quite enough, and it's always interesting and fun to observe how they act and reason. Teaches you a lot about perspective.
I like them quite enough, and it's always interesting and fun to observe how they act and reason. Teaches you a lot about perspective.
Valonquar
Member
I hate children. When a friend has a kid it's pretty much a death sentence for the friendship. Kids destroy everything, and bring nothing to the table I care about.
At 40+ years old I am so beyond tired of the "Do you have kids?" convo you have to have with every hair stylist, dentist, office person.
At 40+ years old I am so beyond tired of the "Do you have kids?" convo you have to have with every hair stylist, dentist, office person.
VAL0R
Banned
I don't feel anything..even with the kids of my friends...
My friends instead they are always happy when they see kids,they speak with them,plays,etc..
And if they are newborn they want to pick them up,they ask questions to parents..and we have to spend at least 40min speaking of kids...
And i am behind waiting like this:
I'm a sociopath?
If you literally feel no warmth or compassion toward even good-natured children, then you definitely are psychologically disturbed. In this case, I would seek counseling. If you just find little kids generally annoying, it might not be a big deal.
I'm not saying this is true of you, but it's possible that feelings like this could be rooted in envy, selfishness, or some other moral defect. For example, I knew a woman once who hated, literally hated, children. She called them "vermin". Is it any surprise that she was an unattractive, bizarre old maid, who had no man and had faced rejection by men? One can easily imagine an envious hatred of happy motherhood distilling into the hatred of children over the years as she in loneliness watched her peers find happiness and make families.
TheContact
Member
kids are great but i don't think anyone is ever prepared for how much time and effort they require for years and years and years
EverydayBeast
ChatGPT 0.001
The thing about kids are in 14 years they're teens and if you don't like kids you won't like teens lol
rofif
Can’t Git Gud
Same here.... Me and my wife (31 and 30) do not have kids and don't want any.
We live comfortably enough and think that the are super annoying and we just don't feel the need to have them. We probably could afford kids but with some major financial sacrifices.
My sister has 2 kids and they are super annoying constantly(one more than the other). They adore me of course. I am THE Santa every year.
Also, we are atheists and my mother would not let me live if we did not baptized the kid and send it to first communion. She would either die of anger or murder me.
For example, we love dogs but do not have one because it requires a lot of time, care and we do not want it to sit alone whole day when we work.
And it does not help that my sister's husband is miserable all the time. The kids sure take a toll it seems... just an observation. Also, every friend goes away when they have a kid.
The pity thought of having to share my pc, console, steam library or whatever meaningless thing with my child makes me anxious... and I don't think it should. I know it's terrible way to think but I can't help to think what I think and to not feel any affliction towards having a kid.
So I am left conflicted. We do not want kids and do not feel the need to have kids. At the same time, it will probably kinda suck a lot when we get old since we will just be sad, alone and miserable. But I also feel that it is selfish to have kids in order to build Your elderlyhood. And in the end, You might not like Your kids, they might not like You or live in another country. I am not sure how to proceed but for sure we do not feel it... To abandon out bedroom,(would be a room for kid) limit our free time and hobbies... all of that for annoying kids who will probably hate me.
edit: tl;dr me and my wife are selfish fucks
We live comfortably enough and think that the are super annoying and we just don't feel the need to have them. We probably could afford kids but with some major financial sacrifices.
My sister has 2 kids and they are super annoying constantly(one more than the other). They adore me of course. I am THE Santa every year.
Also, we are atheists and my mother would not let me live if we did not baptized the kid and send it to first communion. She would either die of anger or murder me.
For example, we love dogs but do not have one because it requires a lot of time, care and we do not want it to sit alone whole day when we work.
And it does not help that my sister's husband is miserable all the time. The kids sure take a toll it seems... just an observation. Also, every friend goes away when they have a kid.
The pity thought of having to share my pc, console, steam library or whatever meaningless thing with my child makes me anxious... and I don't think it should. I know it's terrible way to think but I can't help to think what I think and to not feel any affliction towards having a kid.
So I am left conflicted. We do not want kids and do not feel the need to have kids. At the same time, it will probably kinda suck a lot when we get old since we will just be sad, alone and miserable. But I also feel that it is selfish to have kids in order to build Your elderlyhood. And in the end, You might not like Your kids, they might not like You or live in another country. I am not sure how to proceed but for sure we do not feel it... To abandon out bedroom,(would be a room for kid) limit our free time and hobbies... all of that for annoying kids who will probably hate me.
edit: tl;dr me and my wife are selfish fucks
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rofif
Can’t Git Gud
how old is the fiancee? if You are 39, You will be really old parents right ?
Moogle11
Banned
I'm with you there. Never remotely wanted them, got a Vasectomy nearly a decade a go to take the risk of having them away after meeting my now wife who also can't stand and never wanted kids. We actively avoid places that have lots of kids running around etc. as they just drive us nuts. Thankfully we have nice close knit friend group of other mostly child free people/couples.
highrider
Banned
Naah just white and western ( probably )I don't feel anything..even with the kids of my friends...
My friends instead they are always happy when they see kids,they speak with them,plays,etc..
And if they are newborn they want to pick them up,they ask questions to parents..and we have to spend at least 40min speaking of kids...
And i am behind waiting like this:
I'm a sociopath?
John2290
Member
Same, I never know what level of consciousness they are at or if I should talk to them like you'd talk to a dog or make a more mature comment that'd fly over their head or how to speak to them at all really. I remember when I was a child and someone would try and make a comment that they'd think would fly over the head while i smile, nod along while thinking "is this absolute twat bag serious, does he/she think I'm a damn baby or what? Fuck this person". It freaks me out how that line has moved so far back cause of parents putting ipads in their childrens hands right of the womb.
Classicrockfan
Banned
OmegaSupreme
advanced basic bitch
Smells a bit like a ree "fuck dem kids" thread honestly. I do agree that other kids besides your own can be annoying.
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rofif
Can’t Git Gud
sure, that's my worry too but also - having kids does not guarantee that they will like You, take care of you or even live in the same part of the world.
It is a nice thought but not a guarantee
DogofWar
Member
I was a little extra mean for the sake of argument in my comment yes. Of course nothing is ever taken for granted but I somehow do not worry at all that my kids would not like me. Good parents raise good kids with so few exceptions that they are not worthy to take into account honestly.
Virt McPolygon
Banned
Not having kids does not mean you'll be alone or lonely in old age. There are things you can do like have pets, join some kind of club, take classes, volunteer etc.
HarryKS
Member
Your line ends with you son. Are you winning?
Virt McPolygon
Banned
What's there to win?
J-Roderton
Member
Same. I've got a young'n on the way, though. I'm sure my opinion will change.
mekes
Member
In some ways yes and in others no. We have both been quite career driven and children were not important for either of us in the past. In the UK where we are, leaving children til later is starting to become more common.
rofif
Can’t Git Gud
Yeah that's a normal thing recently. My family is very young and a though (especially for woman) to have a child after 30 is a much
JayK47
Member
There is definitely a lot of pressure to not have kids these days. Especially now. I can't imagine having kids right now. We waited until our late 30s to have kids and it was a little late to be honest. My kids are still young and I am not looking forward to them getting older and all of the BS they have to deal with today. Kids these days have so much BS to deal with compared to when I was a kid. Way too much access to garbage before their young brains can properly process it. I used to run around town by myself or friends when I was young with no supervision and no reason for concern. I can't even imagine letting my kids do that.
Anyways, if you are financially able and live in a nice area, having kids is not so bad. Now that I have kids, I can't imagine not having kids. I just think, when I am much older, who is going to give a shit about me if I were not to have kids? Dying alone scares me, and is probably one of the main reasons I had kids.
Anyways, if you are financially able and live in a nice area, having kids is not so bad. Now that I have kids, I can't imagine not having kids. I just think, when I am much older, who is going to give a shit about me if I were not to have kids? Dying alone scares me, and is probably one of the main reasons I had kids.
HarryKS
Member
nikolino840
Member
My mom , lol
But need a girl first
WildBoy
Member
No matter who you are you are most likely going to die alone figuratively as well as literally... Having kids does not ensure you will die with people around you.
Moogle11
Banned
Yep. Less so in other countries were adult children taking care of their elderly parents is the norm, but having kids certainly doesn't mean not dying alone here. Hell, my parents would be mortified if my brother or I had to care for them and were deliberate in saving up enough for in-home care, nursing homes etc. if needed.
Plus, my wife is 6 years younger than me, so as long as average life expectancy bears out I should die first anyway.
In any case, I'd rather die alone than had to suffer through years of caring for kids I never wanted (hell, I don't even like having pets to care for), spending hundreds of thousands raising them that could go to having a better life, retiring younger etc. Easy trade off for me. Obviously different for people who want kids. To each their own.