The following is a true story that happened at approximately 12:05PM today. Certain names have been replaced with false names to protect my identity.
I was leaving school today and heading to the train station. There was this girl, let's call her "Sue" who I was walking with. She really isn't my gf or anything like that (but I've been working on her since the beginning of the semester). So, "Sue" is talking on and on. I usually don't listen to much of what she says because most of what she talks about is pure s!$# (did you this movie? did you see that movie? which cellphone do you think I should get? etc. etc. Just think "adult teeny bopper". Her only saving grace is that she likes DBZ, plays games, and watches Enterprise. Other than that, I just offer the occasional nod and "Yeah", because, after all, I'm just trying to pull a hit-and-run...).
ANYWAY, on the stretch of road(breezeway) that leads out of the school back into city-area, there's three marine recruiters. They're usually 3 days out of every month, but more recently for some reason it's like they're out there 6 days out of every month. It's usually one white guy, one black guy, and one random(of any race) woman. They usually try to recruit by having the white marine talk to white guys, the black marine talk to black guys, and the woman talk to women. I've watched them doing this before on several occasions while eating my lunch for a while now. I guess they figure people will relate better that way; very methodical indeed.
Sue and I were about 20 feet away from them...
NOW, before I continue, I would just like to say, I'm not a guy who goes looking for trouble. Most of the time I keep to myself and can be considered somewhat shy. But, at the beginning of September, I decided I was going to quit drinking soda(pepsi, coke, dew, etc.) and switch over to seltzer water. I went cold turkey and after about two weeks, I started to feel what could only be called withdrawal. Long story short, this led me to do some crazy ass things to get my sugar fix (considering I averaged 6 cans of soda a day, that's a lot of sugar to replace). So, before my classes were done for the day, I was downing Snickers bars and Ice Cream Sundae poptarts(you can eat these hot, cold, or at room temperature) in the back of my ASM class with a nice cup of coffee. By the time class was over, my sugar high was reaching critical levels.
OK, so Sue and I were about 20 feet away from the recruiters who had this table setup on the sidewalk with pamphlets. They were trying to get passerby's to come over, but they were using their 1337 dodging skills to get away. She, Sue, was still yammering about something, so I cut her off and said "Watch this! I'm gonna zing this guy!".
I didn't confront them, knowing they would come to me. So as I was walking by the table, the marine(black one) stood up from sitting down. This guy was HUGE. He had to be at least 6'10". I underestimated his size and immediately I thought, "Maybe I shouldn't mess with this guy.", but it was too late. Sue had already stop, so I had to go through with the zing or look like a chump, worst yet, in front of Sue. Heres how the conversation went.
Marine: "Now.. you look like a man of integrity!"
<I freeze at the table>
<Marine extends hand for a shake>
<I shake his hand; it easily dwarfs my own>
Marine: "What's your name, son?"
Me: "John Doe."
Marine: "Well Mr. Doe, what are you studying?"
Me: "Computer Science."
Marine: "Computer Science? Is that like with C++ and programming?"
Me: <nod><nod> "Yeah."
Marine: "What are you planning on doing with it?"
Me: "I was thinking of trying to get into something like Software Engineering."
Marine: <nod><nod> "So, did you ever think of joining up?"
It was as that moment. David Vs. Goliath. Goliath had just swung his mighty fist, David dodged and was already spinning that sling ready to strike with his stone. In this case, my zing.
Me: <I looked him in the eye sternly and shook my head> "When Bush reinstates the draft, then I'll join up. Until then, not a moment sooner!" <Promptly turns on his heels and walks away>
Marine: "Whoa whoa whoa! Wait a minute! Hey. Hold up!"
Me: <still walking, doesn't look back>
-silence-
At that moment, I was firmly believed I zinged the guy and zinged him good and in doing so, redeemed myself for those who called me an idiot for sticking by my party and voting for Nader. But I was wrong. So wrong. =(
Next thing I know, my feet are off the ground. I'm in mid-air and I'm not totally vertical 90 degree angle, but more of a somewhat 75 degree angle.
Sue: "OMG!" <laughter>
When if finally registered, I realized that recruiter had gotten his left arm under my left arm across my chest and his right arm over my right shoulder. It didn't really hurt or anything at first, so I didn't struggle for like the first 5 seconds. I tried joking my way out of it at first and said "Heeeey! This is no way to treat civilians!". He didn't say anything. It seemed like another 5 seconds passed by. He still had the hold on. By this time, some other familiar faces started to stop and watch.
I decided to take it up a notch, and try a more forceful tone. So I yelled, and started struggling, it came out more like this though, "Ay! Get offa me!". He tightened the hold and I started to feel an uncomfortable sensation where my neck meets at the shoulder.
He then turned, and spun me stopping abruptly; My legs flailing about wildly. I made copies of my transcript for insurance purposes earlier that day, so when he spun me, some of my change spilled out and bounced all over the place too.
I'm not a big guy myself. I'm only 5"7' and weigh about a buck 30, so you have to realize how ridiculous this all was. A 23 year old grown ass man getting rag-dolled in the middle of the street.
He still didn't say anything. I was starting to wonder if this guy had snapped and he was trying to kill me. Then I said to myself fuck it, he started it, I'll end it. With my free right arm, my elbow had a clear shot of his ribs. So I jab it in there once, it had no affect. The guy didn't even flinch. I jabbed it in there a second and I hit my funny bone (you know that weird thing behind your elbow that feels like a cord and feels really bad if something jams into it?) and decided not to do it again.
The guy was CLEARLY wearing body armor under his uniform. Nobody can take shots like that!
I yelled "Yo! Get off me!" again. Finally, he starts laughing and says "Had enough?". By this time, Sue is still there cracking up as well as the other two recruiters and a couple of other people I knew.
I didn't say anything just stopped struggling. He asked me if I had enough again. I didn't say anything. Then he finally let me go. When my feet hit the ground, I just bolted up the street. I didn't even bother to pick up my change or look back. =/
I've got classes tomorrow, then I'm off for thanks giving until Monday, one week after that, then I'm off until I take my finals. I'll probably just try to lay low until finals, and ride out the winter break. This thing should have blown over by then, but I can't help but wonder if I should have spent my youth playing outside instead of playing video games inside, so that I might of grown tall and had more muscle.
Don't let this happen to you. =(
I was leaving school today and heading to the train station. There was this girl, let's call her "Sue" who I was walking with. She really isn't my gf or anything like that (but I've been working on her since the beginning of the semester). So, "Sue" is talking on and on. I usually don't listen to much of what she says because most of what she talks about is pure s!$# (did you this movie? did you see that movie? which cellphone do you think I should get? etc. etc. Just think "adult teeny bopper". Her only saving grace is that she likes DBZ, plays games, and watches Enterprise. Other than that, I just offer the occasional nod and "Yeah", because, after all, I'm just trying to pull a hit-and-run...).
ANYWAY, on the stretch of road(breezeway) that leads out of the school back into city-area, there's three marine recruiters. They're usually 3 days out of every month, but more recently for some reason it's like they're out there 6 days out of every month. It's usually one white guy, one black guy, and one random(of any race) woman. They usually try to recruit by having the white marine talk to white guys, the black marine talk to black guys, and the woman talk to women. I've watched them doing this before on several occasions while eating my lunch for a while now. I guess they figure people will relate better that way; very methodical indeed.
Sue and I were about 20 feet away from them...
NOW, before I continue, I would just like to say, I'm not a guy who goes looking for trouble. Most of the time I keep to myself and can be considered somewhat shy. But, at the beginning of September, I decided I was going to quit drinking soda(pepsi, coke, dew, etc.) and switch over to seltzer water. I went cold turkey and after about two weeks, I started to feel what could only be called withdrawal. Long story short, this led me to do some crazy ass things to get my sugar fix (considering I averaged 6 cans of soda a day, that's a lot of sugar to replace). So, before my classes were done for the day, I was downing Snickers bars and Ice Cream Sundae poptarts(you can eat these hot, cold, or at room temperature) in the back of my ASM class with a nice cup of coffee. By the time class was over, my sugar high was reaching critical levels.
OK, so Sue and I were about 20 feet away from the recruiters who had this table setup on the sidewalk with pamphlets. They were trying to get passerby's to come over, but they were using their 1337 dodging skills to get away. She, Sue, was still yammering about something, so I cut her off and said "Watch this! I'm gonna zing this guy!".
I didn't confront them, knowing they would come to me. So as I was walking by the table, the marine(black one) stood up from sitting down. This guy was HUGE. He had to be at least 6'10". I underestimated his size and immediately I thought, "Maybe I shouldn't mess with this guy.", but it was too late. Sue had already stop, so I had to go through with the zing or look like a chump, worst yet, in front of Sue. Heres how the conversation went.
Marine: "Now.. you look like a man of integrity!"
<I freeze at the table>
<Marine extends hand for a shake>
<I shake his hand; it easily dwarfs my own>
Marine: "What's your name, son?"
Me: "John Doe."
Marine: "Well Mr. Doe, what are you studying?"
Me: "Computer Science."
Marine: "Computer Science? Is that like with C++ and programming?"
Me: <nod><nod> "Yeah."
Marine: "What are you planning on doing with it?"
Me: "I was thinking of trying to get into something like Software Engineering."
Marine: <nod><nod> "So, did you ever think of joining up?"
It was as that moment. David Vs. Goliath. Goliath had just swung his mighty fist, David dodged and was already spinning that sling ready to strike with his stone. In this case, my zing.
Me: <I looked him in the eye sternly and shook my head> "When Bush reinstates the draft, then I'll join up. Until then, not a moment sooner!" <Promptly turns on his heels and walks away>
Marine: "Whoa whoa whoa! Wait a minute! Hey. Hold up!"
Me: <still walking, doesn't look back>
-silence-
At that moment, I was firmly believed I zinged the guy and zinged him good and in doing so, redeemed myself for those who called me an idiot for sticking by my party and voting for Nader. But I was wrong. So wrong. =(
Next thing I know, my feet are off the ground. I'm in mid-air and I'm not totally vertical 90 degree angle, but more of a somewhat 75 degree angle.
Sue: "OMG!" <laughter>
When if finally registered, I realized that recruiter had gotten his left arm under my left arm across my chest and his right arm over my right shoulder. It didn't really hurt or anything at first, so I didn't struggle for like the first 5 seconds. I tried joking my way out of it at first and said "Heeeey! This is no way to treat civilians!". He didn't say anything. It seemed like another 5 seconds passed by. He still had the hold on. By this time, some other familiar faces started to stop and watch.
I decided to take it up a notch, and try a more forceful tone. So I yelled, and started struggling, it came out more like this though, "Ay! Get offa me!". He tightened the hold and I started to feel an uncomfortable sensation where my neck meets at the shoulder.
He then turned, and spun me stopping abruptly; My legs flailing about wildly. I made copies of my transcript for insurance purposes earlier that day, so when he spun me, some of my change spilled out and bounced all over the place too.
I'm not a big guy myself. I'm only 5"7' and weigh about a buck 30, so you have to realize how ridiculous this all was. A 23 year old grown ass man getting rag-dolled in the middle of the street.
He still didn't say anything. I was starting to wonder if this guy had snapped and he was trying to kill me. Then I said to myself fuck it, he started it, I'll end it. With my free right arm, my elbow had a clear shot of his ribs. So I jab it in there once, it had no affect. The guy didn't even flinch. I jabbed it in there a second and I hit my funny bone (you know that weird thing behind your elbow that feels like a cord and feels really bad if something jams into it?) and decided not to do it again.
The guy was CLEARLY wearing body armor under his uniform. Nobody can take shots like that!
I yelled "Yo! Get off me!" again. Finally, he starts laughing and says "Had enough?". By this time, Sue is still there cracking up as well as the other two recruiters and a couple of other people I knew.
I didn't say anything just stopped struggling. He asked me if I had enough again. I didn't say anything. Then he finally let me go. When my feet hit the ground, I just bolted up the street. I didn't even bother to pick up my change or look back. =/
I've got classes tomorrow, then I'm off for thanks giving until Monday, one week after that, then I'm off until I take my finals. I'll probably just try to lay low until finals, and ride out the winter break. This thing should have blown over by then, but I can't help but wonder if I should have spent my youth playing outside instead of playing video games inside, so that I might of grown tall and had more muscle.
Don't let this happen to you. =(
