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[AniHawk]

(Take no offense to any of this)

In the Year 2000, Sony will introduce a dual screened handheld with a touch screen. They will be praised for their brilliance and innovation.

In the Year 2000, Microsoft and Nintendo will join forces to produce a home console to combat Sony. In an attempt to understand this move, GAF will instantly implode.

In the Year 2000, Hiroshi Yamauchi will cut all ties with Nintendo and start up a new company. He will wind up in a hospital however, after somehow hitting himself with his own car.

(And then go ahead and post your own)

 

[Alcibiades]

(Take offense to any of this)

in the year 2000

Nintendo will spend their $6 billion in the bank to bring the GCN online and never make that money back...

Microsoft will a videogame for profit...

Sony will release a system that needs to be cuddled to keep from breaking...

 

[Kon Tiki]

In the year 2001

Microsoft will enter the console market. ROFL!

 

[Culex]

Oh, jesus. Now that you added that pic, my brains hurts.

 

[AniHawk]

Oh, jesus. Now that you added that pic, my brains hurts.

Why?

 

[Kudie]

-Nintendo will embrace online gaming and release online capable titles such as MK: DD!! and F-Zero GX.
-lag-free online versions of 3-D fighters will enable great players throughout the world to challenge one another.
-xbox will recieve great support from japanese game companies such as Konomi and Square.

 

[Prince of Space]

In the year 2000...

SquareEnix will release Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children, in which Aeris will be revived. Six months later, as a response to a major backlash, SquareEnix will release Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children: International.

 

[AniHawk]

Here are a couple from other people from the first topic:

In the Year 2000, Rare will finally release Perfect Dark 0, which will be just that: a black screen.

In the Year 2000, N-Gage sales will surpass the GBA's, thanks to Nokia's crack-for-games program.

 

[FrenchMovieTheme]

come on dudes, 7 posts and no duke nukem forever jokes? for shame

 

[AniHawk]

In the Year 2000, the Dreamcast 2 will make its debut. It will come with a condom, however, so fans will be prepared for when Sega screws them.

 

[Prince of Space]

In the year 2000, Square Enix will release Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children, where beloved character Aeris is revived. Six months later, due to a major backlash, Square Enix releases Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children: International.

{Edit} D'oh! Double posted!

 

[AniHawk]

Aye.

 

[AniHawk]

This sure died fast.

 

[cvxfreak]

In the year 2000...

Sega will be #1.

 

[Ecrofirt]

Nintendo.... SECRETS!

Everyone knows that Gumpei Yokoi was hit by a car and died. What people don't know is that Olimario has his brain inside the cyborg he's calling Christie Elaine.

 

[Hellraizah]

In the year 2000, Capcom will annonce the Devil May Cry serie to be exclusive to GameCube. Nintendo fans will praise the game as the second coming of God.

In the year 2000, free roaming will become so popular that every game made will become a free roaming game and thus, the goal of every game will become abstract and people will enjoy chilling around in a virtual city more than actually do something.

In the year 2000, online gaming will be a fad.

In the year 2000, casual people will be able to install PC games, since technology development will attain incredible levels of "plug and play" to reach general lowering IQ of the population.

In the year 2000, Gran Turismo will attain a new level of realism never tried in any racing game before by adding damage to cars in the game. Producer of the game will claim that car companies finally agreed to let them do it in the game, and he then deny rumours of lazy programmers being the cause of "not doing it before".

In the year 2000, the best games released that year will be games from 1980-1995, re-released in retro style.

In the year 2000, Valve will release Half Life 2 with a reworked source code since the first one was stolen. The game will not be on par with their previous source code work. At the same time, a lot of first person shooters from other companies will come out with incredible physics in real time.

In the year 2000, every ex-GAF member will have his own personnal forum starting with his nickname and followed by "-age.com" or "-age.net".

 

[Grubdog]

In the year 2000, people will be speculating on what will happen -4 years later, for fun.

 

[RiZ III]

In the yeaaaaaaar 2000:
-Duke Nukem Forever will be go alpha.

In the yeaaaaaaaar 2000:
-Sega will buy out the industry and then die.

In the year 2000:
-Itagaki will open up a nude beach

In the year 2000:
-Shenmue 3 will come out featuring a cross dressing ryo. The game will be Segas best selling title featured exclusivly on NGage.

In the year 2000:
-Yamauchi will pass away. Out of dispair, Mario will get drunk, rape and kill every villager in the mushroom kingdom.

In the year 2000:
-Sega will declare it contracted HIV after fucking all its fans up the ass.

 

[cvxfreak]

In the year 2000:
-Itagaki will open up a nude beach

Hahahahahahahahaha I'm surprised he hasn't already!

 

[IAmtheFMan]

In the year 2000:
In an attempt to to appeal to the male-teen crowd, Nintendo's Reggie Fils-Amie will undergo a sex change, become Regina, and be about "giving ass and taking names."

In the year 2000:
In a strange turn of events, Itagaki will discover the truths behind the Kennedy assassination, Roswell New Mexico, and the il-forgotten fate of Atlantis which he will publish in a 1000 page tell-all book entitled "2000 years of Truths, Discovered." Unfortunately, the book will do very poorly due to the lack of any big-breasted women on the cover. His next book "Cocktail Molly's Water Heater Breaks" will top the NY Times Best Seller List.

In the year 2000:
Sega will reveal plans to re-enter the hardware business. Unfortunately, due to faulty memos around the office Sega will introduce the "Sega hammer" and "Sega drill-bit" collection. Ironically, these will sell 10 times better than any Sega product of the past 3 years.

In the year 2000:
John Romero and John Carmack will reveal that the truth behind their separation was a lovers' spat, and that they have now reconciled their differences. They will move to Massachusettes, get married and adopt 4 Chinese kids.

In the year 2000:
Olimario will be seen on the local news for domestic abuse with his girlfriend. Neighbors report hearing a female voice scream, "... AND YOUR GAY PINK FLUFFBALL KIRBY TOO!" seconds before loud crashing was heard inside the domicile.

In the year 2000:
Nintendo DS will prove to be Nintendo's most succesful platform ever. Sony will announce PSP to be a miserable failure. Interestingly enough, the PSP will still outperform the DS.

If I get bored, I'll come up with more.

 

[human5892]

In the Year 2000...
Nintendo will release mature versions of all of their franchises, as so many have been insisting they do. Most will be terrible, and the company will go bankrupt.

In the Year 2000...
Nintendo will release a console with full online functionality. The service will be remarkably similar to Sony's and Microsoft's, yet Nintendo fanboys will breathe sighs of relief that "Nintendo finally came in and did online right."

In the Year 2000...
Microsoft will realize that those are negative signs next to its Xbox Profits, and will immediately withdraw from the console business.

In the Year 2000...
Sony will release a handheld capable of producing Finding Nemo-like graphics on a gigantic, crystal clear screen. It will cost $45,000 and run on 10 AA batteries for 2 minutes.

 

[MC Safety]

come on dudes, 7 posts and no duke nukem forever jokes? for shame

In the year 2000, we have evolved beyond the need to make Duke Nukem Forever jokes.

 

[Goreomedy]

In the Year 2000, Rare will finally release Perfect Dark 0, which will be just that: a black screen.

Wow, that one was mine. Thanks for posting it, because I was having some serious deja vu in this thread.

 

[Shiggy]

In the year 2000, Konami announces a contract with Silicon Knights that allows them to bring Konami licenses exclusive to Nintendo platforms. Konami is also the publisher of the Revolution game Too Human which was originally planned for the Sony PlayStation. Another big thing is that the two companies work together with Nintendo on Eternal Darkness 2 (Nintendo is the publisher)(for Nintendo Revolution) and on an Action-Adventure(unknown Nintendo platform).

 

[AssMan]

In the year 2000, Miyamoto says Perfect Dark for Gamecube is coming along nicely.

 

[Ferrio]

In the Year 2000, The Gaming Age Forums will Sue Nintendo after they use the slogan "Girl let me touch you" for their Dual Screen.

 

[AniHawk]

Wow, that one was mine. Thanks for posting it, because I was having some serious deja vu in this thread.

No problem. It's one of the only ones I remembered which were good.

 

[AniHawk]

Here's another one I just remembered (and probably butchered):

In the Year 2000, Mario will be arrested in LA for speeding, broken tail lights, and possession of illegal mushrooms.

 

[neptunes]

[strange voice] in the year 2000 [/strange voice]

In the year 2000 Duke Nukem forever will finally be released and it will be exclusive to nintendo's console.

In the year 2000 Nintendo's struggle for sales will push Miyamoto to make a mature mature mario in the same vein of GTA. Reggie will be pleased!

In the year 2000 reggie will finally take over the world by kicking everyone's ass and taking our names.

 

[AniHawk]

Formula for making your own "In the Year 2000" joke:

1. Type "In the Year 2000"
2. Type a probable situation.
3. Type in a twist after the probable situation, at the end, for the punchline.

 

[mattx5]

In the year 2000:
In an attempt to to appeal to the male-teen crowd, Nintendo's Reggie Fils-Amie will undergo a sex change, become Regina, and be about "giving ass and taking names."

Hahaha

 

[AniHawk]

In the Year 2000...
Nintendo will release mature versions of all of their franchises, as so many have been insisting they do. Most will be terrible, and the company will go bankrupt.

In the Year 2000...
Nintendo will release a console with full online functionality. The service will be remarkably similar to Sony's and Microsoft's, yet Nintendo fanboys will breathe sighs of relief that "Nintendo finally came in and did online right."

In the Year 2000...
Microsoft will realize that those are negative signs next to its Xbox Profits, and will immediately withdraw from the console business.

In the Year 2000...
Sony will release a handheld capable of producing Finding Nemo-like graphics on a gigantic, crystal clear screen. It will cost $45,000 and run on 10 AA batteries for 2 minutes.

Haha!

 

[Ferrio]

In the Year 2000
All three companies will pull resources together to make a single console causing half the gaming populace to lose interest.

 

[AniHawk]

Here's one from before FFVIIAC was announced someone did:

In the Year 2000, Square Enix will make it easier for consumers to play their games: you just put the movie in and push play.