cash_longfellow
Member
I stand here…by golly….requesting that Neogaf incorporate a dating thread (free, and always free, you fucks) where we can, put a stop to this bullshit tactic.
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New form of whaling comes to dating apps: $500/month Tinder premium sub, $60/month Hinge
- Thread starter EviLore
- Start date
Dating apps are popular because they took one of the most vulnerable human experiences and commodified it into a few presses of a button. Speaking to another human being requires social awareness and the embarrassing possibility of rejection. People tend to be more confident over text especially after another user accepted a match based on your carefully cultivated profile.
The guys pulling hard on dating apps pull hard IRL. Women are not bothered if somebody interesting finds a natural way to strike up a conversation. Flirting takes place around you all of the time you just need to pay attention. A modicum of social awareness avoids any awkwardness by picking up on queues that a girl is not interested. Dating apps are simply easier for those who are afraid to be vulnerable.
500$ to month to use an app is a scam. Matchmaking services that allow rich men to find mistresses or trophy wives are already quite common in Asia. I know a guy who is black tier on Universe Club
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nush
Member
I've said it before apps were conceived for the creators to actually get more for themselves, by players for players. It did give a boost to the B league players too. Those days are long gone tho.
The issue became that those guy's never got the real life EXP and skillset built up and dating is only the apps for them. Getting rejected right in your face is character building, they cry like being ghosted (No longer replying to messages, there was no relationship there ever) is the worst thing ever.
Thank you. I'm making a note of this for when I'm ready to start dating again. Seems very reasonable for the service you described. I live in a good city to raise a family but not so much for single life in my late 30s if you aren't in to a particular kind of woman...
I'll continue to say that it is gross for one company (Match Group) to have such a large collection of dating apps/sites and chunk of the market when that is something that more and more of the population are using to try to meet someone.
I had a 5 year relationship-->marriage from meeting someone on OKCupid back in 2015 and met many attractive women but the apps have all been Tinder-ized (though Tinder was good back then) and are generally terrible now. I spent a couple of weeks on Hinge, OKCupid, Tender, Bumble, and a few others late 2020 and their all basically the same.
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LiquidMetal14
hide your water-based mammals
The level of desperation to spend 500/month. If you can afford that bill you probably have enough money to go out and live a decent lifestyle and just fine a gold digger in person. If you see one woman a week and take them out to dinner you're in the 100ish range to get yourself 4 women a month to bang.
Live your best life son!
Live your best life son!
Hugare
Member
Eh, depending on your social circle, its kinda hard
When I meet friends, we usually go to someone's house, drink some beers and thats it. Or we go to a restaurant.
We dont go to nightclubs and etc. So meeting someone new would be limited to: someone from work, a friend of a friend and etc.
When I did go to nightclubs/bars, I met tons of girls. But meeting someone this way you usually are attracted by the looks, and then find out that the girls wasnt interesting.
Had 2 girlfriends from dating apps, one ex and the other one is my current (used Bumble for both). Both of them are incredible girls.
But before finding them, I've matched with tons and tons of shitty people on dating apps. But there are tons of shitty people in the world, so what should one expect?
What makes me kinda sad is that some poor (well not so poor in this context) bastard will pay $500 expecting to match with hundreds of girls. And thats not how it works. If you arent atractive or interesting, you wont get matches no matter how much you spend on the app.
Spaceman292
Banned
Time for me and my bottom feeder brothers to rise up
Trogdor1123
Member
I guess I just haven’t ever had those experiences. Of course I’ve always taken time instead of pursuing instant gratification which may or may not be related.
Best of luck to all the young folks out there, it just feels like people don’t know how to engage in even basic conversation anymore to an old timer like me
ÆMNE22A!C
NO PAIN TRANCE CONTINUE
It's easy tho for these companies to prey on the results of *insert reasons*.
There's a cute girl working at our local carwash/gas station and every time she like blushes and stuff when we meet eye to eye.
Just went there and told myself; if we're "alone" ie no customers behind me I'll ask her name or give her a compliment. You know. How it should go. /Rant/Dear diary
Edit she wasn't there
There's a cute girl working at our local carwash/gas station and every time she like blushes and stuff when we meet eye to eye.
Just went there and told myself; if we're "alone" ie no customers behind me I'll ask her name or give her a compliment. You know. How it should go. /Rant/Dear diary
Edit she wasn't there
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Goalus
Member
It seems that either you missed the point or the point missed you. What I'm saying is that both - paying a $500 subscription fee on Tinder and spending $500 on Diablo Immortal MTX - will get you equally far with women. But the latter will give you a few virtual items at least.
Esca
Member
I understand, I wasjust joking
Mikey Jr.
Member
For me and the apps, its the thing of "your interested in dating, I'm interested in dating" vs "im interested in dating, you're interested in doing your job/drinking coffee/reading a book and being left alone and not being pestered by every guy who you come across"
Having said that, I met my fiance on a dating app. So there is some good to be had on there.
D
Deleted member 1159
Unconfirmed Member
Good lord, while I know of a half dozen successful Tinder marriages in my social circle, I just can’t imagine going the app route should I ever find myself single again. I count myself lucky I met my wife before those things became ubiquitous, but honestly I’d much rather try to meet someone at a work conference or some friend of a friend recommendation…the old fashioned way. Paying for the privilege of scrolling through a bunch of heffers on my phone hoping one might want to suck my dick if my profile makes me look sufficiently wealthy and handsome sounds so depressingly sad
Trogdor1123
Member
For sure, whatever works for you is what you should do. I’d probably look like a dinosaur out there now days
Buuuut, if you make a video of all the stuff you get in Immortal that gets 10 million views, THEN you get the chicks.
Maybe film it while wearing a skimpy bathing suit in the tub....that's seems to help
chromhound
Member
I found my girlfriend on Hinge but i would never pay 60$. Crazy 
Cyberpunkd
Member
Now imagine how socially damaged you have to be to pay for Tinder sub instead of high class
Cyberpunkd
Member
It’s more like “he will simp for me and buy me expensive gifts”.
Klosshufvud
Member
More and more people my age seem to hook up via Tinder. It is now the standardized way to initiate a relationship. Great for people who have attributes that are highlighted on a visual-based app. If you're not in some super big social circle or on Tinder, it's going to be real rough game. As mentioned, the tolerance for IRL flirting is also lowered as people now prefer their dating to be digital instead. The guys who don't do well adapting to social media suffer the most.
I think it will take some years before something cracks and the pendulum swings the other way again. But it won't be soon.
I think it will take some years before something cracks and the pendulum swings the other way again. But it won't be soon.
nush
Member
Newsflash, if you've got your shit together in your 30's it's basically a pussy buffet. Those younger ladies will be chasing you for that DILF dick. On the apps anyway. Or you can go up the range and grab those MILFs yourself.
RJMacready73
Simps for Amouranth
thats insane, who the hell goes out for dinner and then stares at a phone especially on a date
SafeOrAlone
Banned
You got this next time, brother.It's easy tho for these companies to prey on the results of *insert reasons*.
There's a cute girl working at our local carwash/gas station and every time she like blushes and stuff when we meet eye to eye.
Just went there and told myself; if we're "alone" ie no customers behind me I'll ask her name or give her a compliment. You know. How it should go. /Rant/Dear diary
Edit she wasn't there
Neogaf wingmen > Tinder.
nush
Member
Valentines day in current year;
The women are there for validation.
The men are there because they are simps hoping to get some pussy. Narrator: They won't and will be kicked to the curb like a Christmas puppy the next day.
Cyberpunkd
Member
Why? Just have good career, be reasonably handsome and confident - easy as pie. It's a numbers game.
I detest social apps but when I was single a few years back there was absolutely no problem smashing every 2-3 days with a different chick.
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Jsisto
Member
I really wish it was as easy as you guys like to make it sound. I have a good job, but im not college educated. I'm 5 foot 4, don't consider myself ugly but I wouldn't say I'm handsome either. Pretty much the only likes I've gotten are giant whales. I'm not just looking to smash, I'm 36, so I'm really not that desperate. It's just a demoralizing experience. Everyone's mileage with these things will vary.
AJUMP23
Parody of actual AJUMP23
5’4” man. That is going to be a hard sell. Assuming you are in the US where women demand men over 6’.
Jsisto
Member
Lol tell me about it.
Croatoan
They/Them A-10 Warthog
*Shrug* I met my wife on match.com 10 years ago. She looked exactly like her photos and her personality was what I expected from the short burst of match communications we shared before our first date.
It does work, but maybe I just got lucky?
I will say that 99% of my interactions with online dating back then were garbage, but it was worth it for the 1%.
It does work, but maybe I just got lucky?
I will say that 99% of my interactions with online dating back then were garbage, but it was worth it for the 1%.
AJUMP23
Parody of actual AJUMP23
You couldn’t hear me because I am 6’6”.
nush
Member
The most common problem guys have on the apps is that they have poorly chosen profile pictures. Ideally what you want to have there is full body shot, picture of you doing an activity, picture of you with a group of friends, if you've got a dog, picture of you with the dog. No nerd shit at all. Keep rotating the pictures until you find the ones that get commented on the most.
thefool
Member
Your experience is perfectly normal. Most men experience in tinder is terrible, don't get demoralized over it.
Okcupid used to post data about their own website (now deleted....). https://web.archive.org/web/2012072...d.com/index.php/your-looks-and-online-dating/
Its a mix of more men than women on these websites, men being thirsty as fuck and women perception of male attractiveness being very different from men perception of female attractiveness, leading to women rarely swiping right.
Are men intimidated by highly educated women? Undercover on Tinder
In this study, we examine the impact of an individual's education level on her/his mating success on the mobile dating app Tinder. To do so, we conduc…
www.sciencedirect.com
The result is something similar to this:
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For sure. When I was on dating sites in the early 00's, pre selfie/camera phone, like 95% of girls used a pic where they are cropping out the guy they were with. But guys had like 1 yearbook photo or a group shot from a school class pic or some shit.
It was true then and probably double true now, if you say you love hiking and running on the beach, better have some pics of you doing those very things in your profile. Girls resomd to the guys ATTITUDE, while a guy just needs to verify the girl has a definable waist before he commits
nush
Member
That's right up there with the group shot photo where 100% she's always the least attractive one in the group.
LordOfChaos
Member
All of these apps including Hinge now that it was bought out are just shoveling men in particular to a pay to win formula and if you make the mistake of paying once, I swear they demote you afterwards so you get fewer matches and want to pay again, since they know you do it.
These apps are just dogshit for men these days. They make you think you're much worse than you are. An average looking man has a match rate of 1-2 in 100. Potentially thousands of swipes to find one decent date. The top 80% of women are on average only going for the top 20% of men, leaving the bottom 80% of men competing for the worst 20% of women. These sorts of situations can mess with you and you might be a perfectly average normal man but you think you're just undesirable.
I see advice from women bloggers all the time about improving your profile and whatnot, I mean go ahead and do that, but it's only going to boost you a bit, 10% over 1 in 100 is still only 1.1 in 100. I challenge any of them to find the most mid guy in stock photos, make a dating account, and see how successful they are matching their own gender. From Software difficulty for making it a man of color, particularly brown.
My opinion...Dating apps came in, took over the dating market, and killed their own appeal. Try going out and doing a few casual approaches, hone your skills at it, and you might find you're actually much much better in person, where a split second judgement on a photo on a dating app had you in the garbage pile as an average man. Does it involve dealing with a few rejections for every success, yeah, but that's just your lot in life as a man or you play the forever alone game since as politically correct as we are and as much as we say things are all equal, it almost never happens that women approach first, and the dating apps are just dead if you're not a top 10% man appearance wise.
These apps are just dogshit for men these days. They make you think you're much worse than you are. An average looking man has a match rate of 1-2 in 100. Potentially thousands of swipes to find one decent date. The top 80% of women are on average only going for the top 20% of men, leaving the bottom 80% of men competing for the worst 20% of women. These sorts of situations can mess with you and you might be a perfectly average normal man but you think you're just undesirable.
I see advice from women bloggers all the time about improving your profile and whatnot, I mean go ahead and do that, but it's only going to boost you a bit, 10% over 1 in 100 is still only 1.1 in 100. I challenge any of them to find the most mid guy in stock photos, make a dating account, and see how successful they are matching their own gender. From Software difficulty for making it a man of color, particularly brown.
My opinion...Dating apps came in, took over the dating market, and killed their own appeal. Try going out and doing a few casual approaches, hone your skills at it, and you might find you're actually much much better in person, where a split second judgement on a photo on a dating app had you in the garbage pile as an average man. Does it involve dealing with a few rejections for every success, yeah, but that's just your lot in life as a man or you play the forever alone game since as politically correct as we are and as much as we say things are all equal, it almost never happens that women approach first, and the dating apps are just dead if you're not a top 10% man appearance wise.
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Jsisto
Member
All true. Also, there's no way you can rationalize the heavy monetization of dating apps being healthy for the actual dating marketplace. It's pure greed. And that's just based on what you're told you're paying for. For every new tier they introduce, there's bound to be stuff people paying less or nothing at all are being excluded from, it's the only way they can justify it. I'm on match right now with a basic membership(doubt I'll renew based on my experience thus far), and they're literally offering to charge me another 6 dollars to see if someone read my message. It's a sick joke.
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Klosshufvud
Member
What an honest, smart and insightful post. I agree with all. Don't let your app appeal be confused with your actual appeal. It sounds almost dystopian, that our entire worth would boil down to a mere 3-4 pictures. Imagine if our forefathers had seen us now. They would surely turn in their graves. Imagine if as kids/teens we had known the future waiting. How utterly demoralizing that would've been.
No shame in whale riding. Some make a lifestyle out of the pleasure. Your height is a dealbreaker in an aesthetic only market like Tinder. You should look for those christian dating sites. 30+ year old Catholic virgins are not terribly picky.
darrylgorn
Member
This.
The problem isn't online dating. It's the stigma associated with it and society's counterproductive dating beliefs as we go through our technological evolution.
Online dating allows more connections with people, which means more dating opportunities. The online dating pool is stacked in women's favour, since men outnumber them 4:1.
At the same time, you will have women who shame men for using online dating as their method of dating instead of meeting in person. They clamour for an organic meeting but paradoxically, are more closed off in public and will make no intention whatsoever to approach themselves.
Now layer in the expectation of monogamy from date one. Add to this the antiquated expectations of 18th century chivalry and the economic expectations of the 50s, like paying for the bill no matter what the cost or who consumed what. Dating 'gurus' reinforce these ideals by propagating stereotypes and traditional behaviours that don't make sense in a modern world.
As this is happening, the workforce is becoming more egalitarian and women are more independent than ever before.
It's not surprising that we are in a mess.
We have technology and the economy influencing us in one direction while society belligerently denies the existence of those influences and acts to oppose them.
We won't get better until we evolve our cultural expectations of dating and how we interact in public.
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I would date you.
