Once you feel the baby kick you'll turn around.
Yeah, I probably will. It's just such a comically tragic situation. I get out a a several year relationship, which was an agonizing process, motivated by the desire to be free and rebuild myself. It wasn't always easy but in the time I had I accomplished alot. But then I knock up the first girl I started dating seriously.
I do like this girl but right now I pretty much have to fully commit to the situation or be a bastard and get locked out entirely. The journey I fought so hard to make possible is shut down before it really even began. She's great and I care for her but it's just not (yet?) a situation I would have doubled down on.But now I have no choice. I'm neutered, so done, so far gone. Fuck.
I'm not against having a child right now, it's just that I feel liek there are so many awesome girls out there that I haven't meet yet. I don't want to feel "stuck" again but that's pretty much what I'm doomed to right now. It just kills me to know there are probably girls out there that I could feel fireworks for but because of the situation I've put myself in, I will have to pass them by.