wcw2000.tumblr.com
WCW Thunder 10/11/2000
Maybe since Thunder is in Australia in front of hot crowds, they'll actually put some effort into it.
TO THE BACK. Steiner chokes Meat into giving a message to Sanders: He wants Booker T(onight).
Thunder Down Under! I wish WWE didn't completely phone it in when they do shows out of North America. It's always a chance to do things a little differently, but they never do. They book them just like they'd book anywhere else. This place actually is bigger than where they ran Nitro.
Shane Douglas/Lance Storm vs General Rection/Konnan
Shane admits to being a drug dealer for Konnan. Wat. Lance actually gets a huge face reaction. Hey, remember when MIA and the Animals were feuding not very long ago? I do. Konnan vs Shane Douglas has to be the worst possible feud WCW could come up with at that time. I guess Lex vs Konnan could be worse. Now huge "Canada sucks" chants. But they just went crazy for Lance 3 minutes ago. YAK fight on the floor. Kidman appears and hits the Kid Krusher on Shane, Hugh hits the moonsault for the win.
The Cat and Ms. Jones come to the ring to make a big announcement. But first, he wants to make an apology to Sam Greco. Sam is now the newest member of the WCW roster. He gives his back story as an ass kicking kickboxer. Stevie Ray is burying the shit out of him for no reason. Because he has an accent. Because he's boring. Because he's just a kickboxer. The NBTs come out. Some jerk off and your mom jokes ensure. "I think he has him pegged." "No pun intended." Mark Madden knew of pegging in 2000? Creepy. Cat books Sanders in a match against Mark Madden. Wat. Sanders books Cat against Coach Nash. Cat changes Sanders to be booked against Showtime. "It's not HBO, bitch, it's Sting!" Meat hits the ring and gets kicked in the face by Sam. Despite having 6 dudes, they won't hit the ring until Nash shows up. Pussies.
TO THE BACK. Goldberg is getting geared up. Sanders tells the NBT to be cool.
NBT vs MIA WCW Tag Team Championships
MIA get the jobber entrance. Stevie always says "O'Hara". Always. And no one corrects him. Lash says they put on the best matches in the business. I don't buy it. GOD DAMNIT MARK MADDEN, STOP THE FUCKING TOMMY RICH IMPRESSION YOU FAT FUCK! Four of five times a show "Did sumbody say sumtin bout getting fiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrredddddddd up?" You fat fucking asshole. Shut the fuck up. Lash pins Jindrak with a rana. New champs! Sanders makes the rematch right now. The match goes for a few minutes and the Thrillers regain. New champs! This is a big problem WCW had at the time. Guys leading up to a title win, even heels, would win in clean and decisive victories. As soon as they won the title, every match would have to end with cheating, interference, or some other wacky stuff, even for faces. The only guy that regularly defended a title with no problems was Vito. Booker for awhile, but since every match was against Nash, Sting, Jeff, or Steiner, there was always some kind of wacky build up to a clean finish. Booker is allowed to have one clean victory and the rest have to be big clusterfuck finishes or no contests. A WCW rule. It's even worse when guys win clean on the way to winning the title, can't win clean at all while champion, and then go back to winning clean as soon as they drop the belt. Happens every time.
TO THE BACK. Paula is with Elix. This is his house, YAK. He challenges Kidman. Booker heads to the ring. Sanders talks with the NBT. Chuck will be the one to end Goldberg's streak tonight.
Booker T vs Kronik
Ref bump about 2 minutes in. Goldberg comes out. He comes in from behind. SPEAR! He breaks Crush's full nelson. Side kick from Bill, side kick from Booker, and the ref calls a DQ. Really? And Booker is mad at Goldberg for it.
TO THE BACK. Chuck is on the phone with his mom and is freaking out. I'm sure the roaming rates in 2000 for a cell call from Australia to the US were insane. Nash arrives. JTB lets him know the problems going on. Nash doesn't seem to mind.
Kidman vs Elix Skipper
Maybe we'll get another good match. The Rey match was pretty meh. Rey was blown up and Skipper was super sloppy. Kidman hasn't had a match on TV in a month or so. So far, this isn't really anything interesting. Duggan stooging around at ring side is more entertaining. Dragon suplex! Prime Time actually hit his rope walk rana without tea bagging Kidman. Duggan interferes and Elix hits the Overdrive for the win.
TO THE BACK. Chuck is still freaking out when Paula asks him a question. She thinks it is cute he was calling his mom. Mike Awesome heads to the lounge.
TO THE LAVA LAMP LOUNGE. The guests this week are Paisley and Kwee Wee. He asks about Kwee Wee's issues with the NBT. Kwee Wee trained with them. Mike keeps hitting on Paisley, which pisses the Kwee Wee off. JTB attacks and Awesome laughs about it. Isn't he a face? The Harris Boys show up and KO Mike Awesome.
TO THE BACK. Goldberg finishes getting ready. Nash asks Sanders why he's warming up. Nash finds out that he's been booked. He's not very happy as he planned to fuck bitches later.
Goldberg vs Chuck Palumbo
Tony brags about their nice hotel. Bill no sells a top rope shoulder block, spears Meat, then Chuck. Jackhammer for the win. Then a jackhammer and pin on Meat. 7-0, I think.
Mike Sanders vs Sting
"Sting" comes out instead of Sting. He lays down for Mike, but then gets up. Then gets back down. Then the lights go out and Sting comes out. Sting beats up "Sting" and Sanders hits Sting with a bat. Why none of this is a DQ, but Goldberg interfering was is a mystery to me. It doesn't take long for Sting to make a comeback and beat the Cruiserweight champion in two moves.
TO THE BACK. Sanders wants to know where he bros were. Seems like Nash was behind it.
Harris Brothers vs Mike Awesome/Crowbar
Two wild and crazy guys! You'd think that Russo wouldn't have stolen more from SNL after the Kwee Wee/Kiwi thing. I can't believe WCW flew the Harris Boys to Australia. I also can't believe they flew them back. Awesome and Crowbar win.
TO THE BACK. Steiner and his YAK head to the ring.
Scott Steiner vs Rey Mysterio Jr.
Steiner gives women sexual sanctuary. HOLLARRR. Poor Rey. It's like a really abusive father beating on his little son. This was a fun Rey vs Big Man match, but would have been way better if it were 1996 or 2002 Rey.
TO THE BACK. Nash heads to the ring.
Kevin Nash vs The Cat
Next month, we'll get Nitro and Thunder from the UK! Stevie Ray says fuck that shit and he isn't going. Nash looks pregnant. Cat also had a gut. Sanders hits Cat with a chair. DQ. They flew Nash to Australia for a 3 minute Thunder match. Nash was going to powerbomb Cat through a chair, but Booker came out to make a save. Eventually, Sting, Jarrett, and Steiner came out. Then GOLDBERG! Now Kronik. It's chaos! We're out of time!
Marginally more effort put into it compared to a normal Thunder, I guess. Kind of. All the shows feel like they're just spinning their wheels. There really isn't any progression in any of the stories. MIA vs Canada feels like it has been going on forever with nothing happening since they took Gunns, Sting vs Jarrett is already stale since they've had so many matches this year, the NBT don't really even have a storyline, Goldberg is redoing the streak, Booker feels like he's lost in the shuffle compared to how Goldberg and Steiner. None of the minor angles are particularly interesting right now, either. A shitty Konnan vs Shane Douglas feud? David and Stacy? Mike Awesome teaching Crowbar how to fuck? Russo always talks about how he gave everyone on the card something to do, but 80% of the roster feels completely aimless.