Piston Hyundai
Member
I have fond memories of playing Mario Sunshine
Seriously I don't remember anything in particular being wrong with it, what was so bad about it? Like, reduced moveset or something?
Alright, let me break it down for you:
Within your first hour or two with the game you do the same boss fight where you have to wait for a Piranha Plant to open its mouth so you can spray water in it about four or five different times, and go through about ten, fifteen minutes of unskippable narrative dumps. There's literally a scene where you're just sitting there as FLUDD is explaining the story in his monotone voice, and they even do the Ocarina of Time "do you want to hear this again" thing at the end of it.
Of all of the games to add a jarring narrative focus to, they choose the game with a world filled with lame ass Piantas and Nokis. Think of the characters introduced in Sunshine. Are they anybody's favorite? Toadsworth is a boring butler stereotype, the natives of Isle Delfino aren't even really allowed to have personalities since 99% of them don't speak a human language, and Bowser Jr. is just obnoxious. Even if you like Bowser Jr., it's likely because he reminds you of the fonder memories you have of that Baby Bowser fight in Yoshi's Island. It all makes it impossible to care about what's going on in any of the cutscenes.
FLUDD is cool on paper, but his powers are implemented in a fashion that only serves to introduce a load of waiting to the platforming. The hover makes Mario ascend and move at an excruciating pace, to the point that any jump that you can't make without it takes two or three seconds longer than it would with a standard double jump, since you have to wait as you slowly and awkwardly make it far or high enough to clear the gap. The rocket jet, ironically enough, has the opposite problem, since you're waiting an even longer amount of time to fall onto the platform since you no doubt overshot the jump by a significant margin (because the jet only has one setting: "high as fuck"). I like the idea of FLUDD, but as it appears in Sunshine, it goes against everything that made the platforming in every Mario game before it so snappy and fun. The turbo jet is the most entertaining of the three forms, but (of course) you end up unlocking it last and having the least amount of things to do with it.
There are about half the amount of worlds as there were in 64 (with about a quarter of that game's variety thanks to the setting), but the game still tries to act like there's a Mario 64 amount of content with 120 Shine Sprites, meaning that there is a load of filler. Even before you get to the lousy Blue Coins, there are so many repeat boss fights (I think there are only two or three you don't fight more than once) and countless hidden Shines that are either in esoteric locations or are just a frustrating exercise in tedium to get, and the low amount of worlds means that you'll very often be in a situation where you're stuck between two or three different shines that you don't want to get, but have to to progress. You know that old thing of "that one level" that keeps people from revisiting a game? Super Mario Sunshine is a game full of those: there's the Chucksters, the stupid watermelon thing, the Sand Bird, the straight-up busted pachinko game, and the fucking lily-pad ride that puts you through hell before you even get to make a single attempt at it. If a level is tolerable, it's probably dull and unimaginative. If it's creative, it's probably broken or frustrating as shit. Again, this is before getting to the 240 Blue Coins that make up a fifth of the game's content. Sure, the "Secret of" levels where you're FLUDDless are great, but you could probably count the amount of good ones with both hands, and what does it say about the game if everybody's favorite parts of it are the sections without FLUDD?
Super Mario Sunshine fucks things up pretty much every step of the way, and I'm really excited to see Dan pluck it from the movie theater dumpster and wash it off for everyone to see. Anyone who likes that game was either a child that had no time for the game to disrespect, or someone who just swallows whatever has the Nintendo Seal on it, no questions asked.
And is oti really someone you want to emulate?
this was longer than some of the entries in my thread and I hate you for it