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WCW Monday Nitro 10/2/2000
This show is in the Cow Palace, so Konnan is dressed in cow print with a cowboy hat. The Animals hang the Disqo Duck above the ring.
Boogie Knights vs Filthy Animals Ladder Match for the Disqo Duck
What the fuck. How ludicrous. Also ludicrous? Alex Wright still has the Berlyn Rammstein style music. Plus, Konnan, Disco, and Alex Wright in a ladder match. Rey does an Arabian Facebuster with a chair onto the ladder that the Knights are sandwiched in. X-Factor reversed into the Last Dance! Sunset powerbomb off the ladder. Konnan gets the duck. Rey was working for 8 people in this impromptu 6 minute ladder match for the love of a duck.
TO THE BACK. David Flair arrives with the "father" in a hood and handcuffed. Whoever it is, he's got big arms.
Show run down. No run down.
TO THE BACK. Vince Russo gives a prepared speech with his hype man Jim Norton there for support. Russo will relinquish his championship tonight. Tonight, there will be a title match between Jeff Jarrett and Scott Steiner to determine a new champion. This is so weird. It's intentionally terribly delivered. He says he would have kicked Goldberg's ass himself if he weren't a real man.
This brings out Goldberg. I believe Goldberg says that Russo is similar to a piece of feces. Russo says he'll be right out. Lol, what the fuck, Russo comes out in a Popemobile. Russo says that Goldberg will have to win 176 matches in a row. One loss and he'll be fired. Bill kicks out the window of the truck, which sends JB running off. Goldberg gets the keys when MENG attacks him out of nowhere. *WCW production meeting* "You know how Austin vs McMahon is big money?" "Of course." "Well, we've got a Vince and a bald goateed white guy in black trucks." "Close enough."
TO THE BACK. Russo hypes up Meng! He gives Mike Sanders the reins for the rest of the night.
Chuck Zito joins the team for color. Wat.
Sgt AWOL vs Reno Finals of WCW Hardcore Championship
Norman just stopping showing up, but I'm sure it hasn't been 30 days since he defended. Halloween Havoc this year is brought to you by Backstage Assault. Even Slim Jim didn't want to be associated with WCW. Reno got mouthy with Chuck Zito. Vito interferes and Reno gets a super chokeslam through a table. Wall is your new champion. Mike Sanders reverses the decision due to outside interference. Your new champion, Reno! This wasn't a match. It was a promo spot for Oz. Now, I understand that HBO was a Time Warner company and synergy and all of that, but the show they choose to heavily promote is the one that features regular graphic prison rape?
TO THE BACK. Paula informs us that The Cat has changed the main event to Booker T vs Sting for the championship. David tortures the baby daddy.
Shane and Torrie come out. They challenge Konnan and Tygress for Halloween Havoc. But tonight, Shane wants Mike Awesome.
Mike Awesome vs Shane Douglas
ECW! 1993 ECW, maybe. Lex is sitting in the crowd again. Torrie stopped an Awesome Bomb by flashing her bra. Shane hits the Franchiser for the win. Nothing match. Like 3 minutes and 90% was on the floor. After the match, Tygress attacks Torrie. Shane was going to Franchise her, but Konnan rolled out for the save.
TO THE BACK. Jeff and Scott demand that Sanders to change the title match back Coach Nash shows up and says things are under control. Goldberg is getting taped up. Nash pumps Sanders up and sends him into Cat's office with a big ass slap.
A Meng hype video plays. He hasn't been on TV in like 6 months.
TO THE BACK. Paula interviews Meng, who speaks English. This is Meng's last chance. He wants to stay in WCW and to do that he has to destroy Goldberg. "Goldberg....you must die...so I may live." Sanders negotiated a match tonight, but he doesn't say what it was.
Goldberg vs Meng
Thunder this week will be in Australia. Next week, both Nitro and Thunder will be there. This is a FIGHT for about a minute. Goldberg has lived, so Meng must die. 1-0. Kronik attack Goldberg after the match.
TO THE BACK. Sanders announces his match. Steiner/Sting vs Booker/Jeff. The winning team will face each other for the title later tonight. "I DON'T LIKE STING!" David is still shit talking the father. I think he water boarded him.
Jeff Jarrett/Booker T vs Sting/Scott Steiner
Tag partners that hate each other? No way. For real, I'm tired of seeing these 4 together. They've all been against each other so much for months. Steiner and Jarrett against each other for most of Spring and Summer, Booker and Jarrett all Summer, Booker and Steiner most of the Summer, Sting and Booker have had multiple matches, Sting and Jarrett have been feuding, and Sting and Steiner have had a few matches. Sting has been putting in no effort all year, Jeff was already stale as fuck in 1999. Faces are fighting faces, heels are fighting heels, what the hell is going on? It's chaos! Ref bump, guitar shot on Sting. Jeff vs Booker for the title tonight. Again. Great. Haven't seen that match 15 times in the past 3 months.
TO THE BACK. Coach Nash leads the NBT to the ring.
Elix Skipper vs Mike Sanders/Kevin Nash 100kilo and under Championship
Prime Time was deeply offended by Nash calling Beetlejuice "Elix". He wants Nash to come out and he'll kick his big ass, too. Nash says he spent 45 minutes apologizing to Beetlejuice for calling him Elix. Team Canada is barred, Elix has to hit a powerbomb before he can win, and Nash will be involved.
I like Prime Time. I don't like Mike Sanders. Not on the mic, not in the ring. He's a proto-Mr. Anderson, which is a terrible thing to be. Nash talks on the mic. While he's doing this, Elix was waiting on top and hit a missile drop kick 3/4ths of the way across the ring. Nash bumped HARD for it, too. How amazing would it be if Nash jobbed for Elix Skipper. Just the idea makes me giggle. "Is Nash bleeding? I think he may have Beetlejuiced!" Nash hits the jackknife, Sanders makes the pin, and the NBT have 3 titles.
TO THE BACK. Goldberg is leaving when the Red Rooster informs him he has another match booked. The NBT celebrate. Team Canada ambush them. I don't know what noise Duggan made, but it was HILARIOUS. Canadian Hacksaw is so funny. Completely ridiculous and hilarious.
Goldberg vs The Harris Brothers.
Goldberg pins Ron with the spear in 15 seconds. Then he jackhammers the other and pins him. 3-0.
TO THE BACK. NBT ask Coach for an idea for the main event while he's in the shower. David is dragging the father out to the arena.
David Penzer delivers a message to the announcers. The main event with be a 49ers Match. There will be a box on each ring post. One will contain the title, the other three will have weapons that are usable in the match. The first to find the title is the champion. The main event has now been changed four times tonight.
David drags the father in the ring. He's going to reveal his secret identity to the world. David uncuffs the masked man, who takes off his hood to reveal...BUFF BAGWELL! He beats up David for revenge of being handcuffed and presumably beaten. But really, he kind of had that coming if he really did get David's woman pregnant.
TO THE BACK. Buff leaves the Cow Palace.
Booker T vs Jeff Jarrett WCW Championship San Fransisco 49ers Match
Oh man, a FOUR poles match. This is Russo's ultimate dream come true. Did TNA ever have a 6 poles match? I'm pretty sure they used a Stunt Granny at the start of the match. Lol. The first Irish whip into a corner sees a box fall. Jeff breaks it only to find a blow up doll. "I didn't know Kimberly had an action figure." Tony was legit shook at that comment. Booker gets a second box. It contained a picture of Scott Hall. This is stupid.
Piledriver on the Japanese announce table from Book. "Holy Christmas!" In box 3 is a coal miner's glove. This is for real one of the dumbest things I've ever seen. JJ had so many chances to get the last box, but didn't even go near it. It takes like 5 seconds to get up there and grab a box. Booker would be down selling for 30 or more and Jeff would just walk around or taunt. And for some reason, Slick is giving 10 counts when they're both down. And now he's checking for 3 counts from a sleeper. WHY? That's not how you win or lose this match. Lol, Tony says they wrestled 15-18 minutes just an hour ago. That match wasn't even 10 minutes. Book End! Ax kick! And instead of going for the box, Booker goes out to get a guitar from under the ring. But the guitar is stuck under there. Jeff tried to get it as well. He (very slowly) climbs the buckle only to have Beetlejuice appear from under the ring and repeatedly hit Jeff in the balls. Booker grabs the last box, the title just falls out of the back side since these boxes are the shittiest boxes you've ever seen. It fell out before he even tried to break the box. It's a miracle it didn't fall out from a bump or Irish whip. Scott Steiner comes out to hit Booker in the back with the pipe and then puts Beetlejuice in the Recliner to end the show. Not Booker celebrating or even Booker in the Recliner, but a D-grade radio celebrity in the Steiner Recliner ends Nitro. And do you know why the show ended like that? Because Howard Stern said Beetlejuice getting hit with the guitar was the funniest thing he'd ever seen. That mainstream publicity!
Booker's T booking has been terrible. He should still be in his first reign, not starting his 3rd. There was no reason for Nash to beat him last month on a random Nitro 2 weeks before their scheduled PPV match. I don't think Nash even defended it. It was completely pointless other than to have Booker over come the odds, I guess. That feud would have been exactly the same if Booker had never lost the title. He could have pinned Nash clean at the PPV, which would have given him clean defenses over Nash, Goldberg, and Sting and would put him on track to have the longest reign since Goldberg. So he wins the title back that he never should have lost and loses it a week later to Vince Russo, who vacates the title a week later, only to have Booker win it back. So what was the point? And he wins it back in a random chance 4 poles match with comedy gimmicks in the boxes. That's pretty fucking stupid.