• Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.

Hellblade 2 | Review Thread

What Scores do you think Hellblade 2 will get?

  • 50-59%

    Votes: 2 0.9%
  • 60-69%

    Votes: 6 2.6%
  • 70-75%

    Votes: 23 9.9%
  • 76-79%

    Votes: 44 19.0%
  • 80-85%

    Votes: 90 38.8%
  • 86-90%

    Votes: 47 20.3%
  • 90-94%

    Votes: 10 4.3%
  • 95-100%

    Votes: 10 4.3%

  • Total voters
    232
  • Poll closed .
Just played what felt like a 2 hour cave level that made me want to kill myself. the level is basically walking in a cave lighting up the path and then walking some more. maybe 3 combat scenarios and they all play the same so not like it matters. Not to mention the constant fucking talking in your ear through out those 2 hours. and i mean constant. literally every second there is someone talking. every single mother fucking second.

And all of that inner dialogue is trash. its extremely poorly written. it basically boils down to this.
Voice 1: She's brave.
Voice 2: She's not.

Voice 1: Go back.
voice 2: Keep going.

Voice 1: Sky is blue.
voice 2: fuck you.

voice 1: its dark.
voice 2: its bright you cunt.

It's like this ALL the time. Literally every second. Not every other second, on every single second these two cunts are talking over each other.

I dont care if this is what schizophrenia is like. It is not fun. It is bad writing. Whoever thought this was good writing needs to be fired and then sent to epstein's island. The writing deserves an fucking razzie. Level designer of that level deserves to be laid off or forced to go work on elder scrolls online levels just so he sees what basic level design 101 from the 50s looks like.

Seriously, fuck the constant whining and constant walking. I hope phil shuts this studio down because this isnt video games. this is torture.
Promotion back to SlimySnake from being demoted to SlimyWorm.
Season 14 Episode 3 GIF by The Simpsons
 
Last edited:

Mr Moose

Member
d3Hellblade2WinGDKShip.jpg

People who jump right back in to play it a 2nd time are masochists.
How do I check my playtime? That seemed way longer than 5 hours.
Sound is good, lighting is good, game in general is nice looking but has some issues. The water does not react properly, if at all. You can jump off a ledge into deep water and it won't splash, you might get a ripple sometimes. The DoF is a bit meh, it doesn't focus fast enough on the characters most of the time, making it look blurry in cutscenes.
The gameplay is mostly walking with shit puzzles and a few fights (always 1v1).
Not my type of game, I didn't care about any of the characters and I don't even know what the story is about.
 
Last edited:
While all of you fuckers are waging console wars and discussing what's a proper game and what's not, Senua's actress is posting FEET PICS on Instagram:



I'm too shy to post a new thread (unlike Ass of Can Whooping Ass of Can Whooping who pretty much has all fetishes known to mankind), but THIS IS HUGE!


Incredible. Just look at the tarsal bones, the talus and calcaneus. The fine curve of her metatarsals. And god, those perfectly shaped toes from the base to the tips. Absolutely divine :messenger_weary::messenger_ok:
 

Bernardougf

Member
d3Hellblade2WinGDKShip.jpg

People who jump right back in to play it a 2nd time are masochists.
How do I check my playtime? That seemed way longer than 5 hours.
Sound is good, lighting is good, game in general is nice looking but has some issues. The water does not react properly, if at all. You can jump off a ledge into deep water and it won't splash, you might get a ripple sometimes. The DoF is a bit meh, it doesn't focus fast enough on the characters most of the time, making it look blurry in cutscenes.
The gameplay is mostly walking with shit puzzles and a few fights (always 1v1).
Not my type of game, I didn't care about any of the characters and I don't even know what the story is about.
So what you are saying is ... 10/10 ?
 

graywolf323

Member
Another fake neutral gets bopped.

Pretends To Be Shocked Fake Shock GIF by AIDES
yeah but there’s been like half a dozen others in this thread alone

hail hydra GIF


I had a post going about why I think this game has garnered so much dislike, but I erased that shit because the thread is far more entertaining than both the game and my post.

This thread is the gaming version of a Springer episode lmfao.
at least it’s not Maury
maury GIF
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: GHG

S0ULZB0URNE

Member
They're already 3rd party.

I was going by what you said in this post.

"And they are now forced to go third-party"

Sounds future tense but whatever.
And they are now forced to go third-party essentially because those "GOTY contenders" are not making enough money. And they STILL don't sell as well as Nintendo games that get made with a tiny fraction of the budget.

Just pure facts.
 

DavidGzz

Member


Cause they are providing experiences and one is better than the other. Pretty simple. Bringing up a worse game, on your fave piece of plastic, and claiming it's better while spewing nonsense like a game that has all the elements of an action game is just one big QTE and then some shit about Vaseline is peak fanboy.
 
Last edited:

Topher

Identifies as young
Cause they are providing experiences and one is better than the other. Pretty simple. Bringing up a worse game, on your fave piece of plastic, and claiming it's better while spewing nonsense like a game that has all the elements of an action game is just one big QTE and then some shit about Vaseline is peak fanboy.

"Fave piece of plastic" works both ways just like most things. There really isn't much difference in attacking a game because it isn't on you "fave piece of plastic" than defending a game because it is. Would the people attacking the game be attacking it if MS did not buy Ninja Theory? Would the people defending the game be defending it had they not?

Awkward John Krasinski GIF by Saturday Night Live
 

DavidGzz

Member
"Fave piece of plastic" works both ways just like most things. There really isn't much difference in attacking a game because it isn't on you "fave piece of plastic" than defending a game because it is. Would the people attacking the game be attacking it if MS did not buy Ninja Theory? Would the people defending the game be defending it had they not?

Awkward John Krasinski GIF by Saturday Night Live

I played it and liked it. He's the one bringing up a game on team blue in a thread about a game on team green and trying to tell us it's better despite the general consensus being the opposite. Then essentially calling it ugly while the consensus is that's it has the best graphics of any game so far. Seems like fanboy activity to me.

I bet he wasn't doing that in Hellblade 1 threads cause ding ding ding, it's on PS4.
 
Last edited:

James Sawyer Ford

Gold Member
I'll poll the people who reviewed it, nevermind, that's been done. Lol

You mean those that pity the position MS is in and felt afraid to knock it points? Or those that gave it higher remarks just because it’s not a full price game? Or expectations were just much higher for The Order given Sony’s record?

There’s lots of factors that can lead to a game reviewing higher and not being objectively better
 

Topher

Identifies as young
I played it and liked it. He's the one bringing up a game on team blue in a thread about a game on team green and trying to tell us it's better despite the general consensus being the opposite. Then essentially calling it ugly while the consensus is that's it has the best graphics of any game so far. Seems like fanboy activity to me.

I bet he wasn't doing that in Hellblade 1 threads cause ding ding ding, it's on PS4.

And what about you? Love it cuz ding ding, it's on Xbox?

That works too.
 
Last edited:

DavidGzz

Member
You mean those that pity the position MS is in and felt afraid to knock it points? Or those that gave it higher remarks just because it’s not a full price game? Or expectations were just much higher for The Order given Sony’s record?

There’s lots of factors that can lead to a game reviewing higher and not being objectively better

How do you explain actual gamers who bought the game reviewing it higher than the critics? But that is pretty good Fanboy mentality that if something is reviewed well on a competing platform it's because of pity or it's been paid by Microsoft. Also if you don't diss Xbox and actually enjoy games from the Xbox games studios that makes you a fanboy too. Tinfoil hats for everyone!
 

DavidGzz

Member
And what about you? Love it cuz ding ding, it's on Xbox?

That works too,

Yeah because I went in thinking it was going to be s*** and then I actually played it and enjoyed it. My thoughts line up with someone like Karak and most reviewers, that makes me a fanboy. 🤡

Also one major difference is that I love PlayStation games too. Been playing them for decades. Ghost of Tsushima is MUCH better than HB2.
 
Last edited:

James Sawyer Ford

Gold Member
How do you explain actual gamers who bought the game reviewing it higher than the critics? But that is pretty good Fanboy mentality that if something is reviewed well on a competing platform it's because of pity or it's been paid by Microsoft. Also if you don't diss Xbox and actually enjoy games from the Xbox games studios that makes you a fanboy too. Tinfoil hats for everyone!

Which gamers? The number that have played HB2 is far less. Smaller sample sizes aren’t as statistically significant
 

Topher

Identifies as young
Yeah because I went in thinking it was going to be s*** and then I actually played it and enjoyed it. My thoughts line up with someone like Karak and most reviewers, that makes me a fanboy. 🤡

You were the one pointing fingers at fanboys because of the "fave piece of plastic". Don't call me a clown when I turn that around on you. If you enjoyed it then that is all you need you say.
 

DavidGzz

Member
You were the one pointing fingers at fanboys because of the "fave piece of plastic". Don't call me a clown when I turn that around on you. If you enjoyed it then that is all you need you say.

Maybe quit tag teaming up on me whenever someone brings up an unrelated game, especially when the criticisms are nonsense. He can't handle that people like it and are giving it great scores, tears coming down his face while he claims that a worse game is better and that we should retroactively give it a higher score.
 
Last edited:
I’m not shilling for the order like you are HB2. It was a disappointment.

But yeah, the story and lore is way better than HB2, playing a mental patient with daddy issues

Yes, all the reviews are shills because of fear or pity or whatever nonsense you’re spinning currently.

Idc about your opinion on the story of either game, just so long as you’re aware it’s just your opinion.
 
Some of the complaints are true but I must say it doesn't take away from the experience. Game was great. The whispers in her head are excessive though. Those bitches are even talking over the dialogues between characters.
 
Mustered some courage and played till first boss on beach.

Liking the combat. So far game is not feeling like a slog like part 1. Fights are snappy. Perfect parry an enemy and its over. In part 1 they used to last much longer wearing you out.

I do feel it needed many more fights cause it feels good. Boss fight was badass.

Boss fight was amazing. The animations are superb. I still think I prefer the combat in the original… I don’t like the emphasis on parry and focus here. Probably the only thing I like about the original more.

You have some more badass fights ahead.
 
Boss fight was amazing. The animations are superb. I still think I prefer the combat in the original… I don’t like the emphasis on parry and focus here. Probably the only thing I like about the original more.

You have some more badass fights ahead.
I have played very little. But the pacing here feels completely opposite of the original.

Part 1 was a difficult game to finish despite short 10 hrs length. At that time I felt it was intentional from developers to let you have a harrowing experience.

This one, so far pacing feels very fast, something like Arkham City. A couple of sessions and game will be over. Will see after finishing which one I like better.
 

Topher

Identifies as young
Maybe quit tag teaming up on me whenever someone brings up an unrelated game, especially when the criticisms are nonsense. He can't handle that people like it and are giving it great scores, tears coming down his face while he claims that a worse game is better and that we should retroactively give it a higher scorsat.

Tag teaming? lol...you tell yourself whatever you want man. I'm done
 

DavidGzz

Member
I’ll tell you one thing for nothing - if James Sawyer Ford James Sawyer Ford doesnt agree with an Xbox game review, he never stops whining like a little bitch about it, huh? 😂 I was kind of hoping you were still lost trawling the board for Starfield threads to shit up!

Bastard has ruined my favourite character in Lost.


Exactly! Like man, who just keeps going about a game they don't like. Just over and over with his defenders too.
 
Top Bottom