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Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

IT'S DARK AND SCARY! WHAT'S GOING ON?! IS THE SHOW GOING TO START?

No.

WarPig · Dec 15, 2004

Agent Dormer said:
They mentioned Hans Blix in the Splinter Cell preview. It was a complete out of left field moment.

I'm all for topical humor, but a) Hans Blix is totally eighteen months ago and b) who the fuck knows who Hans Blix is anyway? Whacko.

DFS.

Wario64 · Dec 15, 2004

I thought this was a video game awards show?

Haha thsi si fucking hilarious

Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

Wario64 said:
I thought this was a video game awards show?

Seriously. Is this the Source awards?

StrikerObi · Dec 15, 2004

I thought this was the Video Game Awards not Black People on Stage 2004... (not racist, just making an observation).

Plenty of white people play video games, and we play more than Madden, Live, and Halo.

DJPS2 · Dec 15, 2004

Apparently, white people don't play video games anymore.

StrikerObi · Dec 15, 2004

Agent Dormer said:
Seriously. Is this the Source awards?

Not until somebody gets knifed.

BOUCNE BOUNCE!

Belfast · Dec 15, 2004

So far this has nothing to do with video games. BIG FUCKING SURPRISE.

Wario64 · Dec 15, 2004

Man this is worse than them announcing GOTY within 5 seconds of the show last year :lol

Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

Yes, "Come on" and start the show.

ZombieSupaStar · Dec 15, 2004

oh god.....

that was surreal....

in a not good way :lol

Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

THUG, URBAN INTRO! TIME TO GET PUMPED! LOOK AT THE LIST OF A- LISTERS WE GOT!

Clarification: Do we have to listen to those acts again?

strikeselect · Dec 15, 2004

anna nicole?! good god

StrikerObi · Dec 15, 2004

I think I wish David Spade was back...

let's just hope they don't do game of the year first again. Madden WON it last year but somehow didn't even make it to nomination this year. I find this hilarious.

DJPS2 · Dec 15, 2004

Apparently, the DJ on the show didn't like David Spade last year, saying that Spike "got it right this time."

Racism: +25

Arcticfox · Dec 15, 2004

WarPig said:
I'm all for topical humor, but a) Hans Blix is totally eighteen months ago and b) who the fuck knows who Hans Blix is anyway? Whacko.

DFS.

Most people watching the Video Game Awards would only know him from Team America.

Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

THIS JUST IN! SNOOP IS A GAMER! WE HAVE THE DJ'S WORD! STOP THE PRESSES!

Also: WITTY CONVERSATION BETWEEN SNOOP AND CYBER SNOOP!

WILLIS JOKE! NINTENDO HATE!

AlphaSnake · Dec 15, 2004

This fucking sucks already.

StrikerObi · Dec 15, 2004

Hey baby, try and look into the teleprompter more.

Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

Producer: WHY ARE THE ANGELS ON THE STAGE?! THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE IN THE OUTFIELD!

Crappy product placement!

Wait, the award is a VECTOR MONKEY? BUT - IT'S HOT!

Belfast · Dec 15, 2004

Well, at least we know the victoria's secret angels can read off of cue cards!

Angel: What's a video game, now?

DJPS2 · Dec 15, 2004

Don't let the angels talk! They need an interpreter more than Snoopy.

MassiveAttack · Dec 15, 2004

OK. 15 minutes in and still not a single person shown who actually WORKS in the videogame industry.

After all, they're geeks and deeply embarrassing to the general public.

StrikerObi · Dec 15, 2004

More like "Biggest titties by a human female" am I rite?

Did she say "The monkey huhwhat!? That's really cool!"

DJPS2 · Dec 15, 2004

And the winner is... Brooke Burke! Wow! A stunning upset!

AlphaSnake · Dec 15, 2004

Ahahaha....HAHAHA.....AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Brook Burke! :lol :lol

WarPig · Dec 15, 2004

Agent Dormer said:
THIS JUST IN! SNOOP IS A GAMER!

In his defense, Snoop is a pretty big gamer (not as big as Del, but Del's probably more hardcore than I am at this point). Dig up the January 2000 issue of Gamers' Republic to read a brutally baked Snoop's thoughts on the game he'd make given the opportunity.

DFS.

Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

PRE-SHOW HOST WINS! I SMELL A SCANDEL!

BB: SNOOP IS GONNA NEED TO LEARN TO DROP IT LIKE MY SKIRT! THANKS TO EA! ILLUSTRATORS ROCK! BYE NOW!

SantaC · Dec 15, 2004

Someone over at IGN boards said that they showed old Wind Waker footage as the preview of Zelda 2005! Is this true? They really thought that game would be celshaded also? Who the fuck are these people.

Belfast · Dec 15, 2004

Geez. I totally though Judi Dench was gonna win! I mean, that couldn't have just been prodcut palcement for Goldeneye: Rogue Agent, right?! Oh well, then again, Judi Dench isn't really that hot. I can see why they wouldn't pick her.

Brannon · Dec 15, 2004

I only saw 5 minutes, and it's already as embarrassing as the last show. But I can't turn away from a train wreck!

sprsk · Dec 15, 2004

brook burkes performance in the game was just a picutre of her standing around wasnt it?

Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

WarPig said:
In his defense, Snoop is a pretty big gamer (not as big as Del, but Del's probably more hardcore than I am at this point). Dig up the January 2000 issue of Gamers' Republic to read a brutally baked Snoop's thoughts on the game he'd make given the opportunity.

DFS.

I was really just making like of the Flexmaster's comments.

Hey, look, a Mech Assualt commercial!

WarPig · Dec 15, 2004

Belfast said:
Geez. I totally though Judi Dench was gonna win! I mean, that couldn't have just been prodcut palcement for Goldeneye: Rogue Agent, right?! Oh well, then again, Judi Dench isn't really that hot. I can see why they wouldn't pick her.

Judi Dench's role in Rogue Agent was also, like, 10 seconds long, so some kind of twisted justice may have been done here.

Well, no, wait. Carmen Electra DIED OF SMOKE INHALATION in her role. C'mon, you gotta give it up for that.

DFS.

StrikerObi · Dec 15, 2004

Agent Dormer said:
I was really just making like of the Flexmaster's comments.

Hey, look, a Mech Assualt commercial!

This is going to be at least 61 minutes of commercials. They'll cover themselves by saying "it's live we need time for set changes"

Mr. Lemming · Dec 15, 2004

I'm so happy I was playing Pikmin 2 instead of getting involved in watching this. It seems the only possible redeeming factor that could possibly happen is Katamari winning best soundtrack.

Edit: Though I wouldn't be totally offended if Halo 2 won that category.

MassiveAttack · Dec 15, 2004

sp0rsk said:
brook burkes performance in the game was just a picutre of her standing around wasnt it?

Wait, she stood around? She definitely deserved the award then.

paul777 · Dec 15, 2004

Ugh, what I would not give to see the AIAS televise an Oscar-esque awards show. Something with class that would award the actual people who make the games - developers, composers, artists, etc. Anything but this wigger fanservice.

Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

CHEAT CODE AND HOT GIRL... WAIT, WHAT IS THAT FEELING IN MY PANTS?

StrikerObi · Dec 15, 2004

that's it, I think I just had an annurysim. Hot Girls Reading Cheat Codes?

WarPig · Dec 15, 2004

paul777 said:
Ugh, what I would not give to see the AIAS televise an Oscar-esque awards show.

Yeah, but who'd air it? The local PBS affiliate? Public access?

DFS.

Belfast · Dec 15, 2004

Hot girls reading cheat codes! Just the thing I need to get my quivering, little, nerdy gamer e-penis all nice and hard!

DJPS2 · Dec 15, 2004

Mat Hoffman looks like hell, too... too many bails.

Agent Dormer · Dec 15, 2004

BM: VIDEOGAMES VIOLENT!
MATT: POOL OF LAVA MY DANGEROUS TRICK! MY EYES FELL OUT!
BM: I HIT MY NUTS! HAHA!
MATT: IMPORTANT TO VOTE FOR THE GAME AWARDS!
BM: PROMO-PROMO
MATT: LOOK AT THOSE GAMES

StrikerObi · Dec 15, 2004

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Belfast · Dec 15, 2004

Go Katamari Go!

WarPig · Dec 15, 2004

DJPS2 said:
Mat Hoffman looks like hell, too... too many bails.

Well, the guy's flatlined twice (last I checked). At that point, I figure you take what you can get.

DFS.

AlphaSnake · Dec 15, 2004

DAM-EH-CEE?

You fucking assholes! DAH-MAH-CEE! MAH! MAH! MAH!!

WTF? It's not even a launch game. I hate this show.

SantaC · Dec 15, 2004

Too bad this is an american show only. As a euro I can't see it. Probably not missing much anyway.

DJPS2 · Dec 15, 2004

Keep reading, Bobby Crosby.

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