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The Official SPIKE VIDEO GAME AWARDS Show Thread

S

StrikerObi

Member
hahahaha she can't even read the winner!

Also Green Day wins because the rappers split their votes between their three shit songs.
 
A

Agent Dormer

Dirty Drinking Smoker
DJ: LIL'JOHN
CROWD: YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! WHAT! WHAT!
LJ: WHAT?! YEAH?! YEAH!!
RG: NEXT SONG AMAZING
RG2: YOU NOT READY!
LJ: LET'S GET BLOWN!

ME: Time for another break!
 
S

StrikerObi

Member
pxleyes said:
They got one right. I am amazed. Still an EA game though.


OMG, gaming gloves. GIVE ME A PAIR........... :lol
Click to expand...

At least Mike managed to thank the people who MAKE the games.

Also, did anybody notice that during the pre-show Tara Reid mentioned she was exciting about seeing Green Day? I'll bet she already knew the won, and somehow forgot when she opened the "envelope" and had to remember all of the sudden.
 
D

DJPS2

Banned
mj1108 said:
Are we sure we're not watching BET??
Click to expand...

If it wasn't for Sum41, you might be right. Oh, and Green Day. I have a feeling that Motley Crue are going to make themselves look piss-poor.

WHHHHHHAAAATTTTT!!!!!?!!?!?

OOOOOOOHHHHHKKKKAAAAYYYYYYY!!!!!
 
A

Agent Dormer

Dirty Drinking Smoker
DJ: PAPA ROACH IS HERE!
PR1: WISH I COULD TELL EVERYONE THE WINNERS AT THE SAME TIME AT ONCE!
PR2: ANOTHER CATEGORY!
PR3: ANOTHER CATEGORY!

Wait, did they already award these? WTF?!
 
P

pxleyes

Banned
Papa Roach still exists???

Notice something big here. All the awards that make sense (minus the City of Heroes and Blooodrayne ones) are NOT made by EA. The evidence piles up.
 
A

AlphaSnake

...and that, kids, was the first time I sucked a dick for crack
StrikerObi said:
Wait are they knocking off like half the awards at once? Oh my god. what are we going to do for the next hour!?
Click to expand...

Because EA didn't win any of thoe categories! HIDE THE EVIDENCE! PROTECT THE HIVE! 67! 67! 67!
 
S

Sho Nuff

Banned
I am back in America for the first time in a year, and I could easily go into the other room to turn this on BUT YOU COULDN'T FUCKING PAY ME TO DO IT.

And Agent Dormer's commentary is a thousand times funnier, anyhoo.
 
M

mj1108

Member
DJPS2 said:
There are your winners for the night, Nintendo fans. You can turn off the TV, now.
Click to expand...

I was hoping that since they were just naming off winners they would decide to spare us by cutting the show short and just ending it.
 
A

Agent Dormer

Dirty Drinking Smoker
Sho Nuff said:
I am back in America for the first time in a year, and I could easily go into the other room to turn this on BUT YOU COULDN'T FUCKING PAY ME TO DO IT.

And Agent Dormer's commentary is a thousand times funnier, anyhoo.
Click to expand...

Thanks for the kind words! :D
 
D

DJPS2

Banned
Agent Dormer said:
The lack of mention for Metal Gear Solid 3 has me worried.

Also - BloodRayne is a dirty whore. She gave me the clap.
Click to expand...

That's all she gave you? Count your blessings... I've heard worse. :lol
 
S

StrikerObi

Member
mj1108 said:
WTF??? They just naming off winners ???
Click to expand...

Yeah this is just 100% proof that the show is about nothing more than money. They had some big categories hidden in there too!

Also, I don't think any of the games in that montage were from EA. I wonder why they were all shoehorned together... hmmm.

Bloodrayne, fuck people why do you play these games? How did this game ge a sequel!?
 
strikeselect

strikeselect

You like me, you really really like me!
The evidence is clear ladies and gentlemen.

This show is funded primarily by EA while still taking money hats from several other companies for some marketing opportunities.
 
M

Mermandala

Member
WarPig said:
What the fuck do all y'all want an E3 for? I'd give you mine if I could, just to be rid of it.

DFS.
Click to expand...

That was the point, this shitfest is what I'd imagine E3 to be like. but with lines. and frisbees.

also, this show's manual should come with a seizure warning and a notes section.

MMD
 
S

Sho Nuff

Banned
probst.jpg


"THE KIDS LIKE SPIKE TV, DO THEY."

edit: that's EA CEO Larry Probst, who is probably extremely evil
 
A

Agent Dormer

Dirty Drinking Smoker
THE MORE YOU PLAY: DONATE BLOOD FOR VAMPIRES!

DJ: MY MAN, JC EX NYSNC DUDER!
JC: DO YOU LIKE MAYHEM? SLAMMING GRAPHICS?! WAVE YOUR HANDS FOR BURNOUT3!

RG: WHAT'S BETTER THAN CRASHING CARS? AHHH!
RG: 12 CARS OVER THE RAILS, FRIENDS CURSING!
RG: JAW DROPPING EXPERIENCE!

Okay, this isn't an NYSNC concert.
 
D

DJPS2

Banned
DJPS2 said:
JC Chasez?
*barf*
Click to expand...

And he pimped my personal GOTY candidate, Burnout 3. Now it's sure to lose.

Now it's time for two hot Asian women who have never played a video game in their lives.
 
A

Agent Dormer

Dirty Drinking Smoker
BH: GREAT TO BE HERE!
KH: BIG NAME ACTORS IN GAMES. A LOT WHO DON'T GET THE PART! SEAN CONNERY AS KATAMARI DAMACY! WAIT, TOM BROWKAW FOR TONY HAWK? WALKEN FOR EVERQUEST?!

IS THIS A SHAM!? HOW CAN I TRUST SPIKETV!
 
S

StrikerObi

Member
I didn't think those celebrity bits would be funny but the Walken one was great, I'm sorry.

You're about to being your Ever-Quest.
 
S

StrikerObi

Member
Sam Jackson says the smack down on Christopher Lee and EA!

Tobey's line reads were shit in Spiderman 2. Molina did a MUCH MUCH better job.
 
D

DJPS2

Banned
StrikerObi said:
I didn't think those celebrity bits would be funny but the Walken one was great, I'm sorry.

You're about to being your Ever-Quest.
Click to expand...

I wonder if that was Jay Mohr doing the Walken impression.

Big surprise... Sam Jackson wins Best Male Performance for GTA. GTA owns you. Go and kill now!
 
B

Belfast

Member
Well, at least Sam put in a pretty good performance for Tenpenny in SA, but I doubt he was picked to win for his acting ability....
 
strikeselect

strikeselect

You like me, you really really like me!
Sam was picked because they HAD to include some represenation for GTA.
So they probably paid him some bucks to come over and accept the shitty award.
 
S

Sho Nuff

Banned
StrikerObi said:
Tobey's line reads were shit in Spiderman 2. Molina did a MUCH MUCH better job.
Click to expand...

My jaw was dropped multiple times on those reads. "Okay. So use the, uh, control pad to swing. Did you get that? Maybe you should write it down. Huh."
 
A

Agent Dormer

Dirty Drinking Smoker
DJ: IT'S CRAZY, LOOK AT THE HOT CHICK!
MR: HI GAMERS! MIDNIGHT LINES FORMED! SHOWS HOW KILLING ALIENS CAN BE AWESOME! HAD TONS OF FUN DOING A VOICE... DRUNKEN LAUGH! HALO 2, BITCHES!

RG: IT'S THE BEST!
RG: HOW OFTEN DO YOU GET TO KILL YOUR FRIEND'S ON A FRIDAY NIGHT? IT'S A GOOD SPORT.
RG: FRIEND OF MINE ALMOST GOT FIRED FOR PLAYING TOO MUCH!
RG: IT'S ABOUT KILLING YOUR FRIENDS!
 
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